Oops!

Good morning God!

So funny last night .... printed my ticket, did my hair, getting dressed, calling an Uber, heading out to the show! See the banner on the corner ... a block away from the venue. Driver will you cut the light on please .... pull out my ticket. The show is next week! Geez, uber driver, please take me home

Praise Report - Credit Card Debt Free

Hi God!

Went to a Debt-Free Workshop at Second Baptist Church in Pearland, Texas.

I listened to Dave Ramsey's Snowball Approach.

Now, he differs from other's because he says to close the credit accounts.

Suzie Orman says pay off the debt and keep the accounts open. 

I haven't closed any accounts but I will cut them up!

Just found a U.S. News' article outlining how to close credit accounts .... The Right Way!

Thank you Lord for watching over me.

I love you for my covering, for my life.

Yo

My First Night Home: Same Shit, Different Name

Hi God,

First day back from demobilization. Asked my husband ... how about us spending the night together. To my surprise ... I got an unanticipated rebuttal. He asked, why spend one night together? I'm thinking why the discussion.

I explained that I have hopes for us, our marriage. With the months apart from the deployment, we would be able to begin rebuilding, fixing, the foundation of our marriage. Continue the work I thought we were doing in our nightly conversations. Yet, I did want to move all the way back into the master bedroom for the same reasons. There has been a lot of broken promises, commitments, betrayal, disrespect, the spitting, name calling, JAIL! ALOT OF GARBAGE TO SORT THROUGH.

After my efforts were rebuked, I went on upstairs to my bedroom leaving him in the living room. Later, I noticed he's in his bedroom with the door closed. Deja Vu!

I went down to his bedroom to cut of the television ..... his cell phone ringing .... 11:30pm. I look at the phone face and its a number with a name. Itching to answer I don't .... send it to voicemail .... Guess what ... God, I know you already know, lol. It's rhetorical. The number call back! Ok, now we know what time it is. Still I didn't answer but "she" did leave a voicemail this time.

So the next morning, I had Sean a piece of paper with the number on it .... "I don't know this number" he says. Whatever! I offered this is a good time for an explanation, an opportunity to clear up this lie and explain. Nope, he kept to his story ... TELEMARKETER! SMH .... REALLY!

Well, I texted the telemarketer:

"Good morning, This is Yo, the wife of Sean______. You called him last night while he was sleeping. He didn't have your named saved to his phone. So I just took down the number. When I presented the number to him this morning, he doesn't know it. You wil not be the first woman that my husband has not disclosed his marital status. Therefore, I have no issues with you. Unless you knew. You know now. You have my number."

I told Sean about the text. He said she's going to call you. In surprise, why? She has no reason to call me ... she should be calling you! Maybe she did, I'm not sure. But when I went to go check my phone. Surenuff, I had a missed call. I called her back. "Hello", "Hello" she replied. "I'm sorry I don't know your name but I don't need to." She asks, "Is he with you now?" "Yes, right in front of me" "May I speak to him." "Surely" "Sean, the telemarketer would like to speak to you." "Ah, ah, ah" "Mam, I think he doesn't want to speak with you on my phone. I think he's going to call you back from his phone after he leaves our home." "Ok" "Good-bye"

Will his lying and cheating ever stop. There is never any remorse. Just the opposite. Now, the name calling is back: Bitch, Whore, Leach, Freeloader! He's back!

Took liverwurst out of the fridge to eat. Sean hurries out of his seat to the kitchen grabs the sandwich meat from my hand, out of my mouth, and the remaining package on the counter, Sean, I rather throw it in the trash than to allow you to eat it. The turkey burgers he snatched, I'll piss on them first. The bag of coffee, he threatens to open and empty in the trash.

God, you would of thought that I did the betraying.

As long as I have you Lord, I'll will be okay,

Yo

Reunited Again! The Past 5 Months

Hello God!

The past five months have been a whirlwind to say the least.

FEMA called with an orientation schedule giving enough notice to schedule time away from my employer.

Then it happened, Hurricane Harvey, Maria and Irma all within weeks of each other. Now, expect to be deployed from EMO: Emergency Management Orientation. Resigned from my employer and off to EMO!

Went from Virginia to Nevada to Texas! Left September 17th, one day home in November, and demob to return home Feb. 2, 2018.

I had three interviews: landed one of the them .... the least pay but may have farther reaching benefits! The VA!

Thank you God!

YO!

Closer to Being Farther from the Past

Hi God,

Thank you so very much. Getting around to getting this implant and saying good-bye to the fist in the mouth by one. Good-bye Doc. I should have let him leave that day. I pulled him back from walking out the door. Nope, kept him from leaving and this is what I got.

So, many times you have opened a door to advance me and/or protect me from others ... and myself.

I had the dead tooth pulled last December 2016. Then the flipper. Today, the anchor! In 120 days the final tooth.

Moving farther from the past!

Am I a Ladder or Rope

Dear God,

Do I show Casini, Dorian, Isaac how to get out ... a ladder. Or, am I allowing them to pull on me to get out of their mess ... a rope.

Casini is doing well.

Dorian is trying. Until he understands himself, he'll continue to struggle because this barrier is keep him from being successful. He has what it takes to be successful.

Isaac, is lost. Lost, rejects all assistance. But is willing to beg.

When Is the First Time You Remember?

Hi God,

Ivanla's #FIXMYLIFE, I didn't catch the episode number but it's about a husband who admits his abuse. Ivanla asks the wife why do you stay? How do you lay next to someone that chokes you, calls you the vulgar of names .... My story

Ivanla's discussion with her where she suggests this is not the first time a man has put their hands on you. Question to the wife, "When is the first time a man put his hands on you?" When she was 4 and was molested.

When was the first time I remember a man putting his hands on me. Joe Lonesome, I'll never forget his name. No molestation but very violent. He was violent with mom .... he was violent with me ... and she, mom, forgave him, protected him. She betrayed me by not protecting me.

Next time, my grandfather. Gee and I were home alone.  Gee had one of the neighborhood boys in the house. We sat in the living room talking. When daddy came home, we all were scared. I remember telling him ... she didn't do anything, they were just talking. Against the bathroom door I was pushed. Daddy put his hands around my neck while telling me that she was his daughter. I was not to tell him anything about what to do with her.

Then there's my husband, Sean. When people show you who they are ... believe them! When they say they're meaner than anyone I would have known or will ever know.