Hello Lord,
The past two days .... incredibly stessfull but I survived. Thank you.
Dorian being locked up for Failure to Appear! Traffic tickets!!!! He's learning. His girlfriend bailed him out. This is the first time I haven't had to put up the money. Thank you.
FEMA's deposition done. Ms. Russell represented me well. Thank you.
44 came by the store to say good-bye .... 5-weeks ... the life of a soldier. Not the way I wanted to say good-bye. It's better than him leaving and not seeing him at all.
Past 90 days, as of October 24th, I am wondering how he's feeling about me.
I have invitations to dinner but have declined. In the past, I would have considered as a potential transfer point. Bail from the unsure! Start fresh with the brand new feeling of relationship and attraction.
44 said the first 90 days are when you experience the euphoria of the new person, new attraction, heightened sexual energy and lust ... then the shiny starts to dull and you begin to see the person as they really are ... are they deal breakers???? or points of negotiation, compromise or simply a communication message yet to be communicated. I hope to have a conversation with 44 when he returns.
I'm reading a book entitled, "His Need, Her Needs .. Building an Affair Proof Marriage. Basically, it keeping the feeling you felt the 90 days for the duration of the relationship. Securing "the relationship" will be for the rest of one's life. I want the dinner dates to be with him, the intimate conversations to be with him, disappointments and achievements with him, the name placed in the spot "In Case of Emergency" All of that ... for him.
Lord, you have kept me close my entire life. Thank you.
With all my heart,
Yo
Friday, November 11, 2011
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
This could have been me! Not! Rickie Lake????
Boy, looking at what happened to them ... I was blessed :)
Woman scammed by seniorpeoplemeet.com.
See my earlier post!
Hear about Rickie Lake's internet dating scare!!! OMG
Candidate for Arizona's Governor!! I'm in good company LOLOL
Woman scammed by seniorpeoplemeet.com.
See my earlier post!
Hear about Rickie Lake's internet dating scare!!! OMG
Candidate for Arizona's Governor!! I'm in good company LOLOL
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
44 & Counting
Good Morning God,
First let me thank you for all that you do for me. All that you've done and will continue to for one of your fledgling ... Can you be this @ 50 ... I think so ....I hope so.
44 has my stomach is knots ... better said, putting the responsibility where it belongs ... I have my stomach in knots when it comes to 44. His birthday is Thursday .... I guess I'll be calling him 45 :)
God, I so don't trust my judgement when it comes to men and relationships.
I think Sean may be correct in some way or another when he expressed his fear that when I begin to feel some adversity in the relationship or with the person ... I bail! Gone out the door. Cut my losses before I am in too deep.
But there is where I want to be ... deep in love .... To have that emotional security. Perhaps that's why Chicago and I became such good friends ... he always had an ear and shoulder available for me and without judgement. Chicago would always say ... I not here because of how you feel about me, it's about how I feel about you.
Having longterm relationships ... two ..... one in my twenties which gave me Casini and Dorian and then the other in my thirties resulting in Isaac and Maurie. Really didn't prepare me for the life commitment that I am desiring.
I'm not sure how much to talk to 44 about, how much to share, how much to expose ... I'm back to desiring the place or space for emotional security within the context of the relationship.
What I have done ... is not bailed. I want to talk it out. I want to know his thoughts.
Women do like to talk. We want him to actively listen. 44 does. I glad of that. His Needs ... Her Needs devotes an entire chapter on it.
44 will be gone for 5 weeks. Perhaps I will know more upon his return ...
I have to find a hobby or interest so I'm not making this man my world. I don't want to smother him or lose my own individuality.
God, a pray for peace of spirit and fulfillment.
Love you always,
Yo
First let me thank you for all that you do for me. All that you've done and will continue to for one of your fledgling ... Can you be this @ 50 ... I think so ....I hope so.
44 has my stomach is knots ... better said, putting the responsibility where it belongs ... I have my stomach in knots when it comes to 44. His birthday is Thursday .... I guess I'll be calling him 45 :)
God, I so don't trust my judgement when it comes to men and relationships.
I think Sean may be correct in some way or another when he expressed his fear that when I begin to feel some adversity in the relationship or with the person ... I bail! Gone out the door. Cut my losses before I am in too deep.
But there is where I want to be ... deep in love .... To have that emotional security. Perhaps that's why Chicago and I became such good friends ... he always had an ear and shoulder available for me and without judgement. Chicago would always say ... I not here because of how you feel about me, it's about how I feel about you.
Having longterm relationships ... two ..... one in my twenties which gave me Casini and Dorian and then the other in my thirties resulting in Isaac and Maurie. Really didn't prepare me for the life commitment that I am desiring.
I'm not sure how much to talk to 44 about, how much to share, how much to expose ... I'm back to desiring the place or space for emotional security within the context of the relationship.
What I have done ... is not bailed. I want to talk it out. I want to know his thoughts.
Women do like to talk. We want him to actively listen. 44 does. I glad of that. His Needs ... Her Needs devotes an entire chapter on it.
44 will be gone for 5 weeks. Perhaps I will know more upon his return ...
I have to find a hobby or interest so I'm not making this man my world. I don't want to smother him or lose my own individuality.
God, a pray for peace of spirit and fulfillment.
Love you always,
Yo
Monday, October 31, 2011
I Can Breathe .... Exhale!
Thank you so my God,
I know this isn't the place to talk about it ... but a major hurdle was met today. The past three years have been a horrific place ... Yet, a place where I've really had to rely on faith and belief.
I know in the deepest place in my heart and conscience, I didn't do anything to deserve what was done to me.
Next month, the next hurdle ... depositions .... First weeks of the new year ..... hearing.
God said He will make you enemies your footstool.
Thank you God :)
I know this isn't the place to talk about it ... but a major hurdle was met today. The past three years have been a horrific place ... Yet, a place where I've really had to rely on faith and belief.
I know in the deepest place in my heart and conscience, I didn't do anything to deserve what was done to me.
Next month, the next hurdle ... depositions .... First weeks of the new year ..... hearing.
God said He will make you enemies your footstool.
Thank you God :)
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Church Suppers, Brunches, Fellowships
Some of the most different, eclectic (I know that an odd word to use to describe food) but you never know what tasties will be at the church's monthly pot luck ... or found in the occasional fundraiser cookbook. I buy them at every opportunity!
I found an odd recipe for pineapple pie! It was such a hit with 44 and his guys at Camp Shelby... I had to post it for prosperity.
Lattice Pineapple Pie
Prep Time: 20 minutes
Bake Time: 30 minues
Bake at 400 degrees F., 25 to 30 minutes or until lightly golden brown. Brushing the crust with egg while will give more sheen to the goldening of the crust.
Enjoy!
I found an odd recipe for pineapple pie! It was such a hit with 44 and his guys at Camp Shelby... I had to post it for prosperity.
Lattice Pineapple Pie
Prep Time: 20 minutes
Bake Time: 30 minues
| 1 can (20 oz) Dole Crushed Pineapple, undrained 1/2 c. sugar 2 tbl. corsnstarch 3/4 tsp. salt (optional) 1 tbl. butter/margarine 1 tbl. lemon juice Pastry for 9-inch double-crust pie |
Combine crushed pineapple, sugar, cornstarch and salt, if desired, in saucepan.
Cook, stirring, until thickened and clear.
Stir in butter and lemon juice. Cool Slightly.
Poor filling into unbaked 9-inch pastry shell.
Cut remaining pastry into 1-inch-wide strips for lattice top. Weave strips crisscross over pie to make lattice top. Pinch edges
|
Enjoy!
Partnership with God
Father,
Thank You for the gift of partnership. Thank You that we can stand together stronger and more effective in building Your kingdom. Your Word says that when we dwell together in unity, You command blessing. Today I receive that blessing as I follow Your commands.
In Jesus’ name. Amen
God,
Thank You for the gift of partnership. Thank You that we can stand together stronger and more effective in building Your kingdom. Your Word says that when we dwell together in unity, You command blessing. Today I receive that blessing as I follow Your commands.
In Jesus’ name. Amen
God,
Sunday, October 16, 2011
Dating --- What does it look like?
Maybe more importantly ... what does it feel like? Social activities ... hmmm! Not quite the same as booty calls!!!!
According to Wikipedia:
Dating is a form of courtship consisting of social activities done by two persons with the aim of each assessing the other's suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship or as a spouse. While the term has several senses, it usually refers to the act of meeting and engaging in some mutually agreed upon social activity in public, together, as a couple.
The protocols and practices of dating, and the terms used to describe it, vary considerably from country to country. The most common sense is two people trying out a relationship and exploring whether they're compatible by going out together in public as a couple, and who may or may not yet be having sexual relations, and this period of courtship is sometimes seen as a precursor to engagement or marriage.[1][2]
Casual Dating according to About.com
An interaction between two people who are looking to get to know one another better, without commitments or promises. Either or both parties can be casually dating other people.
Casual dating differs from friends with benefits, in that friends with benefits engage in sexual activity together with no commitments to one another other, whereas casual dating may or may not involve sex, but its primary purpose is to determine what kind, if any, relationship will blossom.
Dating and the Bible
Does the Bible say anything about dating?
No, but it does describe relationships.
If "dating" is defined as two single friends of the opposite sex doing things together for fun without any attraction or romantic desire or intimacy involved at all, there is no issue to discuss regarding dating. They are spending time as friends. The Bible describes and gives directions concerning friendship. But for most, the issue of dating involves "romantic attraction and desire." Therefore "dating" must be approached by what the Scripture says regarding romantic desire and marriage, the only relationship in which romantic desire is to be fully expressed. Also, in our culture, through "dating" people will often find a life partner and marry. How men and women view a "date" and "dating" can have a profound effect on their future. "Dating" is not a relationship, it is a method people employ in our culture to get to know others of the opposite sex that was not employed in Biblical times. The Bible does not talk about "dating," but it does talk about relationships. However, the Bible does describe three kinds of relationships with the opposite sex and gives certain characteristics of each relationship (there are others such as parent/child and sibling, but they don't clarify the issues of dating).
One kind of relationship the Bible describes is friendship.
Proverbs gives several characteristics of friends and friendships. Prov.17: 17 says, “A friend loves at all times.” Prov.18: 24 says, “There is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.” Prov.27: 6 says, “When a friend rebukes you, that rebuke can be trusted.” Prov.27: 9 says, “The pleasantness of having a friend springs from his earnest counsel.” Prov.27: 10 says, “Do not forsake your friend.” These verses bring out the fact that the Lord blesses friendship and encourages us to develop them. Friendship involves three foundational elements, commitment to fulfill the responsibility of a friend, care and concern for the welfare of your friend, and affection. The word "friend" means someone you like who also likes you. This liking involves a "friendship kind of" affection based often on personality and common likes and interests.
According to Wikipedia:
Dating is a form of courtship consisting of social activities done by two persons with the aim of each assessing the other's suitability as a partner in an intimate relationship or as a spouse. While the term has several senses, it usually refers to the act of meeting and engaging in some mutually agreed upon social activity in public, together, as a couple.
The protocols and practices of dating, and the terms used to describe it, vary considerably from country to country. The most common sense is two people trying out a relationship and exploring whether they're compatible by going out together in public as a couple, and who may or may not yet be having sexual relations, and this period of courtship is sometimes seen as a precursor to engagement or marriage.[1][2]
Casual Dating according to About.com
An interaction between two people who are looking to get to know one another better, without commitments or promises. Either or both parties can be casually dating other people.
Casual dating differs from friends with benefits, in that friends with benefits engage in sexual activity together with no commitments to one another other, whereas casual dating may or may not involve sex, but its primary purpose is to determine what kind, if any, relationship will blossom.
Dating and the Bible
Does the Bible say anything about dating?
No, but it does describe relationships.
If "dating" is defined as two single friends of the opposite sex doing things together for fun without any attraction or romantic desire or intimacy involved at all, there is no issue to discuss regarding dating. They are spending time as friends. The Bible describes and gives directions concerning friendship. But for most, the issue of dating involves "romantic attraction and desire." Therefore "dating" must be approached by what the Scripture says regarding romantic desire and marriage, the only relationship in which romantic desire is to be fully expressed. Also, in our culture, through "dating" people will often find a life partner and marry. How men and women view a "date" and "dating" can have a profound effect on their future. "Dating" is not a relationship, it is a method people employ in our culture to get to know others of the opposite sex that was not employed in Biblical times. The Bible does not talk about "dating," but it does talk about relationships. However, the Bible does describe three kinds of relationships with the opposite sex and gives certain characteristics of each relationship (there are others such as parent/child and sibling, but they don't clarify the issues of dating).
One kind of relationship the Bible describes is friendship.
Proverbs gives several characteristics of friends and friendships. Prov.17: 17 says, “A friend loves at all times.” Prov.18: 24 says, “There is a friend that sticks closer than a brother.” Prov.27: 6 says, “When a friend rebukes you, that rebuke can be trusted.” Prov.27: 9 says, “The pleasantness of having a friend springs from his earnest counsel.” Prov.27: 10 says, “Do not forsake your friend.” These verses bring out the fact that the Lord blesses friendship and encourages us to develop them. Friendship involves three foundational elements, commitment to fulfill the responsibility of a friend, care and concern for the welfare of your friend, and affection. The word "friend" means someone you like who also likes you. This liking involves a "friendship kind of" affection based often on personality and common likes and interests.
Thursday, October 13, 2011
Hope
Thank you God for bible study yesterday. I am so grateful for First United Methodist Church and the Women's Bible Study group.
I thank you for Beth Moore and her teachings.
HOPE!
I love you so much for confirmation.
Yo
I thank you for Beth Moore and her teachings.
HOPE!
I love you so much for confirmation.
Yo
Monday, October 10, 2011
Letting Go-- Thanks Joel Olsteen
In order to move forward in life, we have to “let go of the past.” But have you ever wondered exactly how to do that? First, understand that we take hold of things in our minds with our thoughts. Our thoughts become words and actions that determine the direction of our lives. It’s that simple. If you want to choose a new direction for your life, you have to choose new thoughts. If you want to let go of the past, you have to quit thinking about it, quit talking about it, and quit reliving every negative experience.
Oftentimes, when we see someone who has hurt us, that pain and offense is stirred up, and we start thinking about whatagain. But in that moment, I have a choice to make. One of the best things I can do, instead of rehearsing the hurt, is to pray for that person and speak blessing over them.This is my strategy with my mom, sister and my sons.
Remembering, forgiveness is for me. Letting go of bitterness is for me. I don’t want the past to hold me back from what God has in store for my future any longer. Get past the past by choosing right thoughts because God has victory and blessing in store for my future!
I praying for guidance and direction. I pray the men in my life.
Casini, Dorian and Isaac guidance, discernment and protection.
Casini, Dorian and Isaac guidance, discernment and protection.
I pray for healing for Sean.
I pray for 44-year old's heart desires be granted.
A PRAYER FOR TODAY
Father God, I humbly come to You today. I choose to let go of the past. I choose to release those who have hurt me so I can embrace the best that you have for me. Help me to forgive, help me to love, and help me to stay on the good path You have for me in Jesus’ name. Amen.
Best Weekend!
Good Morning God,
Of course You know ... had the best weekend.
44-year old took me to the Hard Rock as payoff to the Jets/Ravens game. Got my sexy dress on! He likes a vixen :) He invited another couple to join us. That's a good sign. Steve Harvey suggests that you get to know the person's friends and family ... that's when you get a true picture of who this person is.
Kayaking this weekend with Ree was fabulous! I always love our mother/daughter time. Thank you so much God for making that happen. The weather was perfect .. the water was tolerable. NO SNAKES! Just turtles!
I love you so much God. I love you so much Jesus!
Yo
Of course You know ... had the best weekend.
44-year old took me to the Hard Rock as payoff to the Jets/Ravens game. Got my sexy dress on! He likes a vixen :) He invited another couple to join us. That's a good sign. Steve Harvey suggests that you get to know the person's friends and family ... that's when you get a true picture of who this person is.
Kayaking this weekend with Ree was fabulous! I always love our mother/daughter time. Thank you so much God for making that happen. The weather was perfect .. the water was tolerable. NO SNAKES! Just turtles!
I love you so much God. I love you so much Jesus!
Yo
Thursday, October 6, 2011
And the Doorbell Rang .... and Rang!!!
Hey God,
Just wanted to say Thank you. Thank you to my 44-year old giving me a call the other day giving me a chance to talk out my feelings. And of course, my perception was totally off. I am trying to just enjoy the budding friendship and the opportunity and journey of getting to know him. Sometimes, we get so caught up trying to fortune tellers that we miss what we have in front of us today!
One of my favorite childhood stories is Aesop's Fable of the the Wolf and the Sour Grapes. I don't want to be that. He's really cool, no drama.
You know, God, I do so much enjoy cooking dinner for him. He seems so content, AND APPRECIATIVE. He knows he has to go to pt! His body is SO fine! Calendar FINE!
Thank you for 44's intervention with Isaac. It felt good to have him, not once but three times put his arm up to keep me from going to the door. I didn't understand until 44 had a conversation with me later in the evening. All the boys and Ree are well aware of what pushes my buttons. Isaac's continuing escalating disrespectful behavior was off the charts .... He came to the house even after I told him that I had company. Isaac laid on the bell and wouldn't let up! As if to say, I know you're in there and I don't care what you're doing, come to the door NOW! Eventually, 44 went to the door, told Isaac I wasn't coming to the door until he was gone. Isaac continued to be disrespectful and 44 shut the door.
I've never experienced someone getting in between one of my children and me. Normally, the stance had taken the form of behind the scenes advice or in the background presence without any type of verbal or physical involvement.
44 going to the door, now I know ... not ever experiencing this before .... His putting his arm up, not once, not twice but three times to keep me from answering the door ... and then, 44, himself, went to the door. All 6'4'' and 260 lbs of sold muscle all packed neatly in Army fatigues. (Nothing more sexy than a man in a uniform ... Yummy) You will not be disrespectful to her tonight, not while I'm here. 44 put himself, voluntarily, as a shield of protection for me. I've never felt that before from ANYONE in all my life. Didn't recognize it as the events were unfolding. Wow. This is what that feels like. Finally, someone had my back. At least last tonight. ~smile~ Someone that I can trust and share ... the beginning of a friendship. Thank you God :)
God, Isaac, Dorian and Casini .... please continue to cover them. Please open their eyes.
Thank you for breakfast with Linda today.
Love you,
Yolanda
Just wanted to say Thank you. Thank you to my 44-year old giving me a call the other day giving me a chance to talk out my feelings. And of course, my perception was totally off. I am trying to just enjoy the budding friendship and the opportunity and journey of getting to know him. Sometimes, we get so caught up trying to fortune tellers that we miss what we have in front of us today!
One of my favorite childhood stories is Aesop's Fable of the the Wolf and the Sour Grapes. I don't want to be that. He's really cool, no drama.
You know, God, I do so much enjoy cooking dinner for him. He seems so content, AND APPRECIATIVE. He knows he has to go to pt! His body is SO fine! Calendar FINE!
Thank you for 44's intervention with Isaac. It felt good to have him, not once but three times put his arm up to keep me from going to the door. I didn't understand until 44 had a conversation with me later in the evening. All the boys and Ree are well aware of what pushes my buttons. Isaac's continuing escalating disrespectful behavior was off the charts .... He came to the house even after I told him that I had company. Isaac laid on the bell and wouldn't let up! As if to say, I know you're in there and I don't care what you're doing, come to the door NOW! Eventually, 44 went to the door, told Isaac I wasn't coming to the door until he was gone. Isaac continued to be disrespectful and 44 shut the door.
I've never experienced someone getting in between one of my children and me. Normally, the stance had taken the form of behind the scenes advice or in the background presence without any type of verbal or physical involvement.
44 going to the door, now I know ... not ever experiencing this before .... His putting his arm up, not once, not twice but three times to keep me from answering the door ... and then, 44, himself, went to the door. All 6'4'' and 260 lbs of sold muscle all packed neatly in Army fatigues. (Nothing more sexy than a man in a uniform ... Yummy) You will not be disrespectful to her tonight, not while I'm here. 44 put himself, voluntarily, as a shield of protection for me. I've never felt that before from ANYONE in all my life. Didn't recognize it as the events were unfolding. Wow. This is what that feels like. Finally, someone had my back. At least last tonight. ~smile~ Someone that I can trust and share ... the beginning of a friendship. Thank you God :)
God, Isaac, Dorian and Casini .... please continue to cover them. Please open their eyes.
Thank you for breakfast with Linda today.
Love you,
Yolanda
Tuesday, October 4, 2011
What's Up???
God,
I've tried not to rush to judgement, give things a chance to grow .... evolve, naturally-without undue pressure.
Today, I am feeling a little queasy in my stomach.
44-year old and I went canoeing Saturday. His thank-you to me for helping with last semester's class.
After we arrived back to his truck ... his phone was ringing off the hook. He answered it and told whoever it was that he was back at his apt. (LIE). If you have to lie to the person ... then don't answer the phone. Or, at least, take care to insure your conversation isn't overheard.
Later, back at his apt. while working on this semester's work. The phone was again, ringing. He kept pushing the button to send the call to voicemail.
A short-while later, he said he had to step out but that I could stay. I stayed to finish working on the math problems ... but I can feel that uneasiness in the pit of my stomach.
I asked all the questions, the day we met at Hooters. I don't want to become the police trying to figure it all out. Too much work .... Too much drama associated with that.
Sunday night, the Jets played the Ravens. That's us. Made a bet: the winner gets to design a nite out. I won. There was a fantastic fumble in the last two minutes of the game. He was suppose to call back later that evening because a posting was needed that evening for class. I was working on one of the problems while he was watching the game.
I called him after the game to tell him the status of the problem I working on so that he could go ahead with his posting. No answer. Knowing what I've seen, I left a message and didn't call again. He didn't call back.
Yesterday evening, he left a message for me to return his call after I get in from work. Basically, he said that he was returning my call for the night before. 24 hours later, I said. Basically, he blew it off ... blew me off. I simply replied he's cool and later.
Seeing what I seen, hearing what I've heard ... the last couple of times ... I know that I've been holding back. He knows that I've been holding back. So, has our status changed???? I'm really unsure where I stand with him. It will be three months soon. I suppose, technically, we are still in the "get-to-know you" stage.
He's been married before ... not sure if he wants to do it again. Not even sure, if he wants a committed, monogamous relationship ... I just know that when we first spoke ... he wasn't involved with anyone, not seeing anyone.
Outside of the experiences mentioned, I have really enjoyed him company. He has a great sense of humor. From what I can tell, a strong sense of integrity. He adores and protects the women in his life ... daughter, ex-wife, mom, aunts, grandma .... So, playing games really doesn't seem like his mo.
I tried to say something to him Saturday but I wasn't making sense.
And of course, it could all be in my head! OM! Alot of times we write out the script and the dialogue before we even had an opportunity to speak to the person. My perception could be totally off.
I'm going to finish working on this week's assignment. Whether he shows up for dinner on Wednesday is an unknown ... we will see.
God, continue to keep me from hurt, harm and danger,
I love you always,
Yo
I've tried not to rush to judgement, give things a chance to grow .... evolve, naturally-without undue pressure.
Today, I am feeling a little queasy in my stomach.
44-year old and I went canoeing Saturday. His thank-you to me for helping with last semester's class.
After we arrived back to his truck ... his phone was ringing off the hook. He answered it and told whoever it was that he was back at his apt. (LIE). If you have to lie to the person ... then don't answer the phone. Or, at least, take care to insure your conversation isn't overheard.
Later, back at his apt. while working on this semester's work. The phone was again, ringing. He kept pushing the button to send the call to voicemail.
A short-while later, he said he had to step out but that I could stay. I stayed to finish working on the math problems ... but I can feel that uneasiness in the pit of my stomach.
I asked all the questions, the day we met at Hooters. I don't want to become the police trying to figure it all out. Too much work .... Too much drama associated with that.
Sunday night, the Jets played the Ravens. That's us. Made a bet: the winner gets to design a nite out. I won. There was a fantastic fumble in the last two minutes of the game. He was suppose to call back later that evening because a posting was needed that evening for class. I was working on one of the problems while he was watching the game.
I called him after the game to tell him the status of the problem I working on so that he could go ahead with his posting. No answer. Knowing what I've seen, I left a message and didn't call again. He didn't call back.
Yesterday evening, he left a message for me to return his call after I get in from work. Basically, he said that he was returning my call for the night before. 24 hours later, I said. Basically, he blew it off ... blew me off. I simply replied he's cool and later.
Seeing what I seen, hearing what I've heard ... the last couple of times ... I know that I've been holding back. He knows that I've been holding back. So, has our status changed???? I'm really unsure where I stand with him. It will be three months soon. I suppose, technically, we are still in the "get-to-know you" stage.
He's been married before ... not sure if he wants to do it again. Not even sure, if he wants a committed, monogamous relationship ... I just know that when we first spoke ... he wasn't involved with anyone, not seeing anyone.
Outside of the experiences mentioned, I have really enjoyed him company. He has a great sense of humor. From what I can tell, a strong sense of integrity. He adores and protects the women in his life ... daughter, ex-wife, mom, aunts, grandma .... So, playing games really doesn't seem like his mo.
I tried to say something to him Saturday but I wasn't making sense.
And of course, it could all be in my head! OM! Alot of times we write out the script and the dialogue before we even had an opportunity to speak to the person. My perception could be totally off.
I'm going to finish working on this week's assignment. Whether he shows up for dinner on Wednesday is an unknown ... we will see.
God, continue to keep me from hurt, harm and danger,
I love you always,
Yo
Friday, September 30, 2011
Jerry Springer in Wiggins, MS
Why do women always want to comfort and blame anyone else but the man with whom she's involved. I will never get that.
I remember when I found out Casini and Dorian's father was cheating with Charlie. I never got mad with her. The betrayal was with Gregory. Always will be.
When Alfred had women riding on the truck ... I didn't blame them for having their asses in there ... shit, Al let them in!
I had a women, Tina, send me the nastiest message via fb accusing me of having fantasies of her "fiance" going on in my head. Now mind you, Sherman Jones, is about 5 feet tall, nappy, nigga nappy, beady bee, high school graduate, works at the local plywood plant (making about $40,000.00--maybe) and lives in a trailer on his mother's property! Get real! Miss Tina! I don't even know where this man lives ... haven't looked for him .... please, not even a hint of curiosity :)
From the years past, I saw "Rev." Jones as a "little" brother working with the youth at Bethlehem Baptist Church ... until last week when he came by expressing wanting more, desiring more ... Where in the hell did this come from! Now mind you, in all his expressions of wanting and desiring over the years, watching and hearing the tales of my dates ... this man and that man, EHarmony, Match, etc. .... That's what single woman do .... DATE!!!! He would ask ... Who are you seeing now? Any prospects?? Nope, but I have a date with Match.com!! Then we would both laugh about it ... How innocent I thought.
When "Rev" Jones asked me to think about him differently, not as a religious leader or friend ... but as a man that is interested in getting to know a woman on a more one-on-one level .... I guess the "Rev" forgot that he moved Miss Tina and her daughters in with him! What was the timing and motivation ... after years of a successful, christian-based friendship .... After discovering this arrangement thru Ree who is friends with one of the daughters, I called him on it a few days later -- Disrespectful, and just so unnecessary, to both her and me! Cat got your tongue Sherman! Geez, it's not a molehole or a mountain! This man is not my concern nor would he ever be!
I'm not sure what Sherman said or didn't say to her ... but I did contact her via phone ... I'm not fbing anyone. I've known Sherman since arriving in Wiggins. He was an assistant and then acting pastor for Bethlehem Baptist Church here in Wiggins, headed the Youth Ministry. That was my only connection to him .... Isaac and Ree! Why do woman come after woman .... although Miss Tina should have no concerns when it comes to me ...
I have my eyes on a 44, 6'4", 260 lb., all muscle--nofat---sexy, OMG sexy, man!
Her concern should be on the one she shares her bed with ... The one for whom she gave up her children's home inorder to move in with him. Investing her finances in a place that at the end of the day .. I hope things work out for her. Really, I do. Watch out Ms. Tina .... he's shown his spots .... a cheater .... a liar ... if the potential is there ... it just doesn't go away ... not even when Rev. Jones puts on the collar!
This only confirms that I did the right thing by resigning from this congregation. A messy group of people.
Sherman betrayed the many years of our friendship but moreover, he betrayed Miss Tina, all in one swoop! Pitiful!
God please continue to lead and direct me!
Yo
I remember when I found out Casini and Dorian's father was cheating with Charlie. I never got mad with her. The betrayal was with Gregory. Always will be.
When Alfred had women riding on the truck ... I didn't blame them for having their asses in there ... shit, Al let them in!
I had a women, Tina, send me the nastiest message via fb accusing me of having fantasies of her "fiance" going on in my head. Now mind you, Sherman Jones, is about 5 feet tall, nappy, nigga nappy, beady bee, high school graduate, works at the local plywood plant (making about $40,000.00--maybe) and lives in a trailer on his mother's property! Get real! Miss Tina! I don't even know where this man lives ... haven't looked for him .... please, not even a hint of curiosity :)
From the years past, I saw "Rev." Jones as a "little" brother working with the youth at Bethlehem Baptist Church ... until last week when he came by expressing wanting more, desiring more ... Where in the hell did this come from! Now mind you, in all his expressions of wanting and desiring over the years, watching and hearing the tales of my dates ... this man and that man, EHarmony, Match, etc. .... That's what single woman do .... DATE!!!! He would ask ... Who are you seeing now? Any prospects?? Nope, but I have a date with Match.com!! Then we would both laugh about it ... How innocent I thought.
When "Rev" Jones asked me to think about him differently, not as a religious leader or friend ... but as a man that is interested in getting to know a woman on a more one-on-one level .... I guess the "Rev" forgot that he moved Miss Tina and her daughters in with him! What was the timing and motivation ... after years of a successful, christian-based friendship .... After discovering this arrangement thru Ree who is friends with one of the daughters, I called him on it a few days later -- Disrespectful, and just so unnecessary, to both her and me! Cat got your tongue Sherman! Geez, it's not a molehole or a mountain! This man is not my concern nor would he ever be!
I'm not sure what Sherman said or didn't say to her ... but I did contact her via phone ... I'm not fbing anyone. I've known Sherman since arriving in Wiggins. He was an assistant and then acting pastor for Bethlehem Baptist Church here in Wiggins, headed the Youth Ministry. That was my only connection to him .... Isaac and Ree! Why do woman come after woman .... although Miss Tina should have no concerns when it comes to me ...
I have my eyes on a 44, 6'4", 260 lb., all muscle--nofat---sexy, OMG sexy, man!
Her concern should be on the one she shares her bed with ... The one for whom she gave up her children's home inorder to move in with him. Investing her finances in a place that at the end of the day .. I hope things work out for her. Really, I do. Watch out Ms. Tina .... he's shown his spots .... a cheater .... a liar ... if the potential is there ... it just doesn't go away ... not even when Rev. Jones puts on the collar!
This only confirms that I did the right thing by resigning from this congregation. A messy group of people.
Sherman betrayed the many years of our friendship but moreover, he betrayed Miss Tina, all in one swoop! Pitiful!
God please continue to lead and direct me!
Yo
Wednesday, September 21, 2011
I am Forgiven, Thank you David
Oh God,
I thank you for my new friend, David. His life is truly inspirational as I think of my own sons. God granted him restoration of life and love. I pray the same over the lives of my children.
I was listening to a bible study hour that comes on at 5am. This older white man sitting at a desk talking into a camera about God and scripture ... Always flipped the channel. I'm feeling really bad right now because I don't know the name of the man or the show. But have continually watched the ministry and am sure this is a learned, spiritual, interpretor of the Word. The Shepherd's Chapel.
2Thessalonians 3:6-10 was given to me today. A viewer wrote in a letter regarding sons that have gone astray yet want to keep coming home for money. How well do I know that! All three sons ... defiant! Doing it their own way, and not going anywhere!
Lord, please cover and keep my children from hurt, harm and danger.
I love you always,
Yo
I thank you for my new friend, David. His life is truly inspirational as I think of my own sons. God granted him restoration of life and love. I pray the same over the lives of my children.
I was listening to a bible study hour that comes on at 5am. This older white man sitting at a desk talking into a camera about God and scripture ... Always flipped the channel. I'm feeling really bad right now because I don't know the name of the man or the show. But have continually watched the ministry and am sure this is a learned, spiritual, interpretor of the Word. The Shepherd's Chapel.
2Thessalonians 3:6-10 was given to me today. A viewer wrote in a letter regarding sons that have gone astray yet want to keep coming home for money. How well do I know that! All three sons ... defiant! Doing it their own way, and not going anywhere!
Lord, please cover and keep my children from hurt, harm and danger.
I love you always,
Yo
Sunday, September 4, 2011
Out of Touch
Hey God,
I apologize ... wondering if I am in the midst of a "left turn"?
You know of course I've been hanging out with the 44-year old soldier, "helping with school work".
I'm wondering more ... if he's actually helping me ... "get my sexy back!" Although, I don't believe its ever been lost, just inactive.
I enjoy the hugs and kisses of this younger, toned hard body that doesn't drink or smoke and works out on the regular.
But I'm not sure what else we may have in common??? Is there, will there be any glue??? We both have a lot going on in our financial lives ... enough not to take that baggage into a new relationship.
I love that he still dreams ... has aspirations ... and a blue print. Maybe the journey and sharing is the glue. I'll have to wait and see.
He'll be gone for a minute so there will be some time apart.
Lord,
I need to ask for a special covering and guidance over my children. Thank you always.
I love you Lord,
Yo
I apologize ... wondering if I am in the midst of a "left turn"?
You know of course I've been hanging out with the 44-year old soldier, "helping with school work".
I'm wondering more ... if he's actually helping me ... "get my sexy back!" Although, I don't believe its ever been lost, just inactive.
I enjoy the hugs and kisses of this younger, toned hard body that doesn't drink or smoke and works out on the regular.
But I'm not sure what else we may have in common??? Is there, will there be any glue??? We both have a lot going on in our financial lives ... enough not to take that baggage into a new relationship.
I love that he still dreams ... has aspirations ... and a blue print. Maybe the journey and sharing is the glue. I'll have to wait and see.
He'll be gone for a minute so there will be some time apart.
Lord,
I need to ask for a special covering and guidance over my children. Thank you always.
I love you Lord,
Yo
Sunday, July 24, 2011
Cougar! Me??
Hey God,
Sorry, I haven't talked with you for a while, but I thank you for always being there.
Boy, this guy is 44 years old .... Does this make me a cougar? I don't know. He say no. Would I date someone 5 years older ... than 5 years younger is still in the same range. Cougar .... at least a 13 years difference.
We met @ Hooters this past Friday, 22nd, after my return from Jackson. Showed up in a warmup suit. Seems a lot taller than in his uniform ... just as sexy! I do know that I enjoyed his conversation. He's funny.
Seems he's dates older; his ex-wife was seven years older.
Has a wonderful relationship with his daughter.
Very protective over the women in his life.
Good first impression. Hope to see him again soon.
Thanks again God,
I love you Lord,
Yo
Sorry, I haven't talked with you for a while, but I thank you for always being there.
Boy, this guy is 44 years old .... Does this make me a cougar? I don't know. He say no. Would I date someone 5 years older ... than 5 years younger is still in the same range. Cougar .... at least a 13 years difference.
We met @ Hooters this past Friday, 22nd, after my return from Jackson. Showed up in a warmup suit. Seems a lot taller than in his uniform ... just as sexy! I do know that I enjoyed his conversation. He's funny.
Seems he's dates older; his ex-wife was seven years older.
Has a wonderful relationship with his daughter.
Very protective over the women in his life.
Good first impression. Hope to see him again soon.
Thanks again God,
I love you Lord,
Yo
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
National Marriage Project
Hi God,
Boy, Your timing ... don't put You on schedule or clock but you are always on time!
Dr. Neil Clark Warren, Founder and Chairman of eHarmony.com, Clinical Psychologist and Author wrote an article: "On Second Thought, Don't Get Married"
Excerpt:
And inspiring marriages don't happen by accident. They require highly informed and carefully reasoned choices. Commitment and hard work are factors too. But after decades of working with a few thousand well-intended and hardworking married people, I've become convinced that 75 percent of what culminates in a disappointing marriage -- or a great marriage -- has far less to do with hard work and far more to do with partner selection based on "broad-based compatibility." It became clear to me that signs which were predictive of the huge differences between eventually disappointing and ultimately great marriages were obvious during the premarital phase of relationships.
See you have got to do the work: weeding, go with your gut! Don't make that turn down the stairs when you can see the light right in front of you.
Thank you again God for the dream,
Yo
Boy, Your timing ... don't put You on schedule or clock but you are always on time!
Dr. Neil Clark Warren, Founder and Chairman of eHarmony.com, Clinical Psychologist and Author wrote an article: "On Second Thought, Don't Get Married"
Excerpt:
And inspiring marriages don't happen by accident. They require highly informed and carefully reasoned choices. Commitment and hard work are factors too. But after decades of working with a few thousand well-intended and hardworking married people, I've become convinced that 75 percent of what culminates in a disappointing marriage -- or a great marriage -- has far less to do with hard work and far more to do with partner selection based on "broad-based compatibility." It became clear to me that signs which were predictive of the huge differences between eventually disappointing and ultimately great marriages were obvious during the premarital phase of relationships.
See you have got to do the work: weeding, go with your gut! Don't make that turn down the stairs when you can see the light right in front of you.
Thank you again God for the dream,
Yo
Monday, July 4, 2011
Sometimes It Over Before It Starts
Hi God,
I wish I could have Steve Harvey.com for 3 months! Match.com will end on the 7th of July. No luck. No luck with EHarmony.com. Sent Sensa.com back for a refund! I will keep the Alli.com.
A retired soldier came into the PX and left his number with one of the cashiers. I did have a chance to talk with him while there. The conversation was polite. He seemed very interested.
He was in the store to purchase a computer. His crashed while working on a paper ... in graduate school working on his Masters in Accounting. Okay, sounds good.
My first reaction ... His breath was FOUL! I had to back up. But was thinking he seems fit ... no stomach. Tall. Not sexy but presentable. When I went outside, I saw him light up a cigarette .... now I understand.
Well, I talked to him this evening. Come to learn that he possibly not intending to finish. Wants just to able to say it on his resume that he is currently working on a Master's degree without the intent of finishing.
What does that say ....? He lacks commitment? He lacks integrity?
No ... not sexy ... smart men are very sexy! Driven men are very sexy! Capable men are very sexy!
Not sexy! Not driven! Not capable!
Love you God!
Yo
I wish I could have Steve Harvey.com for 3 months! Match.com will end on the 7th of July. No luck. No luck with EHarmony.com. Sent Sensa.com back for a refund! I will keep the Alli.com.
A retired soldier came into the PX and left his number with one of the cashiers. I did have a chance to talk with him while there. The conversation was polite. He seemed very interested.
He was in the store to purchase a computer. His crashed while working on a paper ... in graduate school working on his Masters in Accounting. Okay, sounds good.
My first reaction ... His breath was FOUL! I had to back up. But was thinking he seems fit ... no stomach. Tall. Not sexy but presentable. When I went outside, I saw him light up a cigarette .... now I understand.
Well, I talked to him this evening. Come to learn that he possibly not intending to finish. Wants just to able to say it on his resume that he is currently working on a Master's degree without the intent of finishing.
What does that say ....? He lacks commitment? He lacks integrity?
No ... not sexy ... smart men are very sexy! Driven men are very sexy! Capable men are very sexy!
Not sexy! Not driven! Not capable!
Love you God!
Yo
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Promiscuity and Perception
Promiscuity. This entry is for my daughter.
I always want her to know the truth and learn from what life lessons have taught me. She read my blog today and commented, respectfully, that she thought is sounded as if I "got around". Thus, the reason for defining promiscuity.
I told her, no ... and she knows that I don't "get around" but that this blog is about making decision-making .... to say "no" even when you want to say "yes". She thought my fantasing of kissin the Major during my first encounter with him at the gas station was "gross". But that's what makes it a fantasy ... you think, imagine, but you don't!
One day, she will have an "at first" encounter and hopefully she will, as much as she may be attracted, say, "NO". Then perhaps she remember my blog entry and understand.
I wished I had said "No" to her father! I could have detoured from those years. I love my children but the relationship that got them here .... was definitely a turn to go down the stairs .... Dark brown, muscular, 240-255lbs., 6'2" ... naturally, without working out! My family jokingly called him, Jethro. Remember the Beverly Hill Billies! Within three months of our meeting, I was pregnant with Isaac. Two years later, with Ree. If I had waited ... met his family, his habits ...
I hope that what I give her is a mom that's interested in her dreams and aspirations. When you graduate at age 16, only pushing yourself so that you can get out of your mother's house, never really feeling like you had a home. Home being where the heart is. Never felt "the heart" of my mom. Don't remember kisses and hugs or "I love you" on the way out of door. I hope Ree knows that there is no one on this earth more important to me that her and her siblings. I would give my life for them. Sometimes, it feels as if I have.
She must didn't read the entry about instituting the Steve Harvey rule from his book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. The believe Steve gives a lot of good dating advice for women.
One rule ... perhaps ... RULE #1: WAIT ON SEX! Steve suggest waiting 3-6 months ... by then you will get to know the stuff that you wouldn't have gotten to know waiting 3-6 days or 3-6 weeks! Meet his family, meet his friends!
An excerpt from the book: Although I linked it above .... I believe its worth the cut & paste!
"As an auto plant worker, Steve says he had to wait 90 days to receive benefits—and says the same probation period should apply to dating. "In 90 days they checked me out. They determined if I was easy to work with, if I got along well with others, if I showed up when I said I was going to show up, if I was worthy."
Women, Steve says, hold the greatest benefit of all—the cookie—so there's no reason to give it away until you know your man deserves it. "Slow down, ladies," Steve says. "Look, you cannot run us off."
So what if you don't want to wait 90 days? Steve says if you change the probation period, you do so at your own risk. "You all keep changing the rules. And men are aware of the fact that you are changing the rules. We're aware of the fact that you act desperate. We're aware of the fact that you think there's a good shortage of good men out there," he says."
Respect and love thyself!
There's no shortage, but you do have to do some weeding! That's all I'm doing ... weeding ... intuition. A dinner here, lunch there ... A cup of coffee at Waffle House. I like to feel and hear his conversation ... his opinions. Intuition.
I hope she waits for the right one. The one that cares about whether or not at the end of the day is she okay, are her needs met, did he make her smile at least once during her day. Don't settle. Never settle for a 3! Get to know him, get to know his family, his friends ... his ways and beliefs will come out. Make an informed decision not just an emotional one.
I love you very much Ree. I hope to learn something about myself over this year's journey of discovery. Support my journey.
You're 16 and entering your junior year. You will probably have your first boyfriend this year ... junior prom ... preparing for your senior year ... ROTC, COLLEGE, maybe the Delayed Entry Program into the Air Force ... you have choices. Just take your time ... take a breath ... think about if first .... it can wait until tomorrow.
You're about the leave the house to begin your own life's journey and I will be left to continue mines.
My wish for you is peace, love and happiness. Take your time ... have fun, enjoy life. Make sure he's a friend first. Nothing serious until after you finish college then perhaps you will be ready for a longterm relationship .... not marriage .... not yet!
I love you Lord for this opportunity to speak to my daughter who is young lady and becoming a young woman. Lead and guide her, Father.
I love you,
Yo
I always want her to know the truth and learn from what life lessons have taught me. She read my blog today and commented, respectfully, that she thought is sounded as if I "got around". Thus, the reason for defining promiscuity.
I told her, no ... and she knows that I don't "get around" but that this blog is about making decision-making .... to say "no" even when you want to say "yes". She thought my fantasing of kissin the Major during my first encounter with him at the gas station was "gross". But that's what makes it a fantasy ... you think, imagine, but you don't!
One day, she will have an "at first" encounter and hopefully she will, as much as she may be attracted, say, "NO". Then perhaps she remember my blog entry and understand.
I wished I had said "No" to her father! I could have detoured from those years. I love my children but the relationship that got them here .... was definitely a turn to go down the stairs .... Dark brown, muscular, 240-255lbs., 6'2" ... naturally, without working out! My family jokingly called him, Jethro. Remember the Beverly Hill Billies! Within three months of our meeting, I was pregnant with Isaac. Two years later, with Ree. If I had waited ... met his family, his habits ...
I hope that what I give her is a mom that's interested in her dreams and aspirations. When you graduate at age 16, only pushing yourself so that you can get out of your mother's house, never really feeling like you had a home. Home being where the heart is. Never felt "the heart" of my mom. Don't remember kisses and hugs or "I love you" on the way out of door. I hope Ree knows that there is no one on this earth more important to me that her and her siblings. I would give my life for them. Sometimes, it feels as if I have.
She must didn't read the entry about instituting the Steve Harvey rule from his book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. The believe Steve gives a lot of good dating advice for women.
One rule ... perhaps ... RULE #1: WAIT ON SEX! Steve suggest waiting 3-6 months ... by then you will get to know the stuff that you wouldn't have gotten to know waiting 3-6 days or 3-6 weeks! Meet his family, meet his friends!
An excerpt from the book: Although I linked it above .... I believe its worth the cut & paste!
"As an auto plant worker, Steve says he had to wait 90 days to receive benefits—and says the same probation period should apply to dating. "In 90 days they checked me out. They determined if I was easy to work with, if I got along well with others, if I showed up when I said I was going to show up, if I was worthy."
Women, Steve says, hold the greatest benefit of all—the cookie—so there's no reason to give it away until you know your man deserves it. "Slow down, ladies," Steve says. "Look, you cannot run us off."
So what if you don't want to wait 90 days? Steve says if you change the probation period, you do so at your own risk. "You all keep changing the rules. And men are aware of the fact that you are changing the rules. We're aware of the fact that you act desperate. We're aware of the fact that you think there's a good shortage of good men out there," he says."
Respect and love thyself!
There's no shortage, but you do have to do some weeding! That's all I'm doing ... weeding ... intuition. A dinner here, lunch there ... A cup of coffee at Waffle House. I like to feel and hear his conversation ... his opinions. Intuition.
I hope she waits for the right one. The one that cares about whether or not at the end of the day is she okay, are her needs met, did he make her smile at least once during her day. Don't settle. Never settle for a 3! Get to know him, get to know his family, his friends ... his ways and beliefs will come out. Make an informed decision not just an emotional one.
I love you very much Ree. I hope to learn something about myself over this year's journey of discovery. Support my journey.
You're 16 and entering your junior year. You will probably have your first boyfriend this year ... junior prom ... preparing for your senior year ... ROTC, COLLEGE, maybe the Delayed Entry Program into the Air Force ... you have choices. Just take your time ... take a breath ... think about if first .... it can wait until tomorrow.
You're about the leave the house to begin your own life's journey and I will be left to continue mines.
My wish for you is peace, love and happiness. Take your time ... have fun, enjoy life. Make sure he's a friend first. Nothing serious until after you finish college then perhaps you will be ready for a longterm relationship .... not marriage .... not yet!
I love you Lord for this opportunity to speak to my daughter who is young lady and becoming a young woman. Lead and guide her, Father.
I love you,
Yo
Wednesday, June 29, 2011
Jonah - Life Interrupted
Hi God,
Today, I started Priscilla Shirer's, Jonah, Navigating a Life Interrupted. Very excited about the next six weeks of bible study with the women.
The first question asked, "How has you life been interrupted lately? OMG!
Jonah was told by God to go to Nineveh, which a brutal, violent, hopeless place; an enemy of Israel.
God often sends us into the hopeless places because it's in the hopeless place that we can see the hope of God.
So can we really view life's interruptions as that if we also believe that those same things are purposeful, opportunities and in God's plan---Then, aren't those interruptions actually divine intervention?!
I have to believe that each one of the above "interruptions" that I listed has to some how be used to search for significance! How many things/people/relationships will be affected on my response.
God, allow me to respond in complete obedience.
Yo
Today, I started Priscilla Shirer's, Jonah, Navigating a Life Interrupted. Very excited about the next six weeks of bible study with the women.
The first question asked, "How has you life been interrupted lately? OMG!
- Car accident
- Knee surgeries
- Loss of employment
- Loss of income
- Son incarcerated
- Son having a baby
- Mississippi property
- Maryland property
- My best friend's mom becoming ill
Jonah was told by God to go to Nineveh, which a brutal, violent, hopeless place; an enemy of Israel.
God often sends us into the hopeless places because it's in the hopeless place that we can see the hope of God.
So can we really view life's interruptions as that if we also believe that those same things are purposeful, opportunities and in God's plan---Then, aren't those interruptions actually divine intervention?!
I have to believe that each one of the above "interruptions" that I listed has to some how be used to search for significance! How many things/people/relationships will be affected on my response.
God, allow me to respond in complete obedience.
Yo
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
Another One Bites the Dust!
God, Hey ....
Well, I had to get it off my chest with Ras. Explained to him how I felt he handled or mishandled the damage to my waterline. Basically, I felt that he did not demonstrate the competence or the sensibility to understand that when you damage someone's property the responsible act is to restore the person to wholeness. Ras simply had to repair the damage: either himself or contract the work out. Or, allow me to have the faucet replaced and provide him with the bill for the repairs. Ras did neither.
After I finished, of course I felt better. Told him that I thought he was a really nice guy. Using the analogy he gave me about meeting women who seemed to have it all together, held their hands only to find rought skin ... changed his perception of them. Well, the way he handled the damage waterline, changed my perception of him as a man that was capable of getting things done ... at least getting done what pertains to me. It really comes down to integrity.
I don't think I was angry but I may have sounded harsh. I can say I know that I was very firm in my position. This was definately a one-sided conversation. I wasn't looking for an explanation ... maybe an apology.
Ras on the other hand sounded completely flustered. When I asked him if about riding on the beach the next day, today ... He simply said he would get back to me ... His pressure was up.
Well, when I got the call this morning at 5:50 am ... I was impressed that he had the constitution to put it behind him and go forward with the bike ride on the coast today. Said he could be at my house in 5 minutes. When he arrived, I will pulling my bike out of the garage. Ras apologized and said he wasn't going riding and that he should have said. I asked that what are you doing here at 6am????? Ras came to bring me the $25.00. That must have kept him up all night.
I went on with my bike ride around town.
I'm not going to settle ... It doesn't have to be hard. I'm not going to make a square peg fit into a round hole. Not this time.
Thank you God for the dream,
Yo
Well, I had to get it off my chest with Ras. Explained to him how I felt he handled or mishandled the damage to my waterline. Basically, I felt that he did not demonstrate the competence or the sensibility to understand that when you damage someone's property the responsible act is to restore the person to wholeness. Ras simply had to repair the damage: either himself or contract the work out. Or, allow me to have the faucet replaced and provide him with the bill for the repairs. Ras did neither.
After I finished, of course I felt better. Told him that I thought he was a really nice guy. Using the analogy he gave me about meeting women who seemed to have it all together, held their hands only to find rought skin ... changed his perception of them. Well, the way he handled the damage waterline, changed my perception of him as a man that was capable of getting things done ... at least getting done what pertains to me. It really comes down to integrity.
I don't think I was angry but I may have sounded harsh. I can say I know that I was very firm in my position. This was definately a one-sided conversation. I wasn't looking for an explanation ... maybe an apology.
Ras on the other hand sounded completely flustered. When I asked him if about riding on the beach the next day, today ... He simply said he would get back to me ... His pressure was up.
Well, when I got the call this morning at 5:50 am ... I was impressed that he had the constitution to put it behind him and go forward with the bike ride on the coast today. Said he could be at my house in 5 minutes. When he arrived, I will pulling my bike out of the garage. Ras apologized and said he wasn't going riding and that he should have said. I asked that what are you doing here at 6am????? Ras came to bring me the $25.00. That must have kept him up all night.
I went on with my bike ride around town.
I'm not going to settle ... It doesn't have to be hard. I'm not going to make a square peg fit into a round hole. Not this time.
Thank you God for the dream,
Yo
Sunday, June 26, 2011
Is it Me??!
Hey God,
Well, handed him my Letter of Resignation to Bethlehem Baptist Church today. Never in my life have I ever resigned from membership because I no longer wanted to be associated with the ministry or its leadership.
Last Sunday, an announcement was made that the Search Committee would be meeting with the congregation the following Wednesday. The meeting on Wednesday, full of arguing, people walking out, leadership/Search Committee condescending remarks, Head of the Deacon Board doesn't even know what day it is .... Search Committee announces the vote for Pastor will take place the following Saturday, yesterday. The issue came up about eligible votes, it was actually said both active and non-active members can vote. Who are non-active members .... anyone that shows up. Exactly! Any given Sunday the past year ... probably 20 attendees. Voting yesterday, I heard over 100 showed up .... children ... and whoever! The Galloway family came out like bugs under the woodpile to insure their brother received the post of Pastor .... I'm done! The best think for me to do is actually what I did. Resign. Done. Deuces!
Augh! Ras asked me to Lacombe, LA for a Crab Feast Festival. Shouldn't have went ... I feel nothing for this guy since he took no responsibility for the damage to my water line. May not have talked about this. The events took place last Monday:
Talked about my lawnmower being in the shop. Ras offered to bring over his riding mower. I would ride the mower while he weedeat the yard. Well, he ended up bringing his older cousin over, who later Ras says can hardly see, who rode the mower. I went into the house, cut on the water, no pressure. Ras at the door saying his cousin hit the water line. Ras stated he called the City and they were on their way out. I had to go to work. Ras said he would stay until the City arrived. That impressed me that he knew that was the right thing to do. He had already asked me the night of my birthday what I like in a man. I told him: CAPABILITY: THE ABILITY TO GET THINGS DONE WITH LITTLE TO NO SUPERVISION!. Isn't that what guys do? That's what Chicago does when he visits and he's my best friend, not a boyfriend, not a husband! I left for work believing I left my issue in CAPABLE HANDS. NOT!
Talked to Ras the next day. He made the mistake telling me that after the City told him that someone would be coming. HE LEFT! Left with the water fountain spouting in my front yard. Then when he showed up the next day to go bike riding on the beach, I went over to examine the damage. Ras followed me. When I asked him about an anticipated timeframe for making the repairs. He response was, Why? Wrong answer. Why? How about because this was not the condition you found my home prior to letting his blind cousin cut my grass. Then Ras further comments that he doesn't see the need to reinstall the faucet. WHATEVER! Then he further comments that he's surprised it hadn't happened sooner. NOT THE ENTIRE 5 YEARS I'VE LIVED HERE! So, I asked him is he going to contract someone or am I? Then its, I have a friend in the hospital, don't know when he's getting out, but he does this kind of work. WHATEVER AGAIN!
Mr. Evans came yesterday, with no notice, with the faucet and repaired the break. I gave the receipt to Ras today on our way to the festival. He stated that he was surprised that I was charging him. Did he not agree to repair the break! $25.00 dollars: $10.00 for the part, $15.00 for the labour. Mr. Evans wants the money to go to the Stone County Our Daily Bread Food Pantry. To have Ras make the check out to them. For sure. Then Ras said Well pay me for cutting your grass! I started and wanted to say, Kiss My Ass. But instead, said, I didn't ask you to cut my grass. I didn't need you to cut my grass. I have always cut my grass myself!
Contiued in silence to the festival. Really wanted to get over this thing with the water line. Music and food was good. Had a good time. Small event without the overwhelming crowds that New Orleans is known for. Ras asked me if I saw anything that I liked at one of the vendors. I did, a $35.00 turquoise and amber necklace/earring set by Tee's Treasures by Terry Zechenelly: 985-643-4945 (note for myself). He didn't have $35.00. WHAT! Why ask me if I see anything that I liked! Joe, always kept a couple of hundred in his pocket. Isn't that what men do???LOLOLOL!! They are always prepared to handle things. They know. I didn't ask nor to expected, but when you asked be prepared to carry through.
Asked if I wanted to go past his house for drinks. Not! Then he had nerve to ask for a kiss once I got home. NOT! He has no clue that he failed the exam when he left before the City arrived. He failed again when he felt there was no need to replace the damage that he was responsible for causing. He failed when he didn't think he should cover the costs of the repair. He failed when he commented that he should have charged me for cutting my grass. He failed for not having $35.00.
Deuces!
I tried God but I can't do a "3".
I love you much and with you I will always be good. Thanks again,
Yo
Well, handed him my Letter of Resignation to Bethlehem Baptist Church today. Never in my life have I ever resigned from membership because I no longer wanted to be associated with the ministry or its leadership.
Last Sunday, an announcement was made that the Search Committee would be meeting with the congregation the following Wednesday. The meeting on Wednesday, full of arguing, people walking out, leadership/Search Committee condescending remarks, Head of the Deacon Board doesn't even know what day it is .... Search Committee announces the vote for Pastor will take place the following Saturday, yesterday. The issue came up about eligible votes, it was actually said both active and non-active members can vote. Who are non-active members .... anyone that shows up. Exactly! Any given Sunday the past year ... probably 20 attendees. Voting yesterday, I heard over 100 showed up .... children ... and whoever! The Galloway family came out like bugs under the woodpile to insure their brother received the post of Pastor .... I'm done! The best think for me to do is actually what I did. Resign. Done. Deuces!
Augh! Ras asked me to Lacombe, LA for a Crab Feast Festival. Shouldn't have went ... I feel nothing for this guy since he took no responsibility for the damage to my water line. May not have talked about this. The events took place last Monday:
Talked about my lawnmower being in the shop. Ras offered to bring over his riding mower. I would ride the mower while he weedeat the yard. Well, he ended up bringing his older cousin over, who later Ras says can hardly see, who rode the mower. I went into the house, cut on the water, no pressure. Ras at the door saying his cousin hit the water line. Ras stated he called the City and they were on their way out. I had to go to work. Ras said he would stay until the City arrived. That impressed me that he knew that was the right thing to do. He had already asked me the night of my birthday what I like in a man. I told him: CAPABILITY: THE ABILITY TO GET THINGS DONE WITH LITTLE TO NO SUPERVISION!. Isn't that what guys do? That's what Chicago does when he visits and he's my best friend, not a boyfriend, not a husband! I left for work believing I left my issue in CAPABLE HANDS. NOT!
Talked to Ras the next day. He made the mistake telling me that after the City told him that someone would be coming. HE LEFT! Left with the water fountain spouting in my front yard. Then when he showed up the next day to go bike riding on the beach, I went over to examine the damage. Ras followed me. When I asked him about an anticipated timeframe for making the repairs. He response was, Why? Wrong answer. Why? How about because this was not the condition you found my home prior to letting his blind cousin cut my grass. Then Ras further comments that he doesn't see the need to reinstall the faucet. WHATEVER! Then he further comments that he's surprised it hadn't happened sooner. NOT THE ENTIRE 5 YEARS I'VE LIVED HERE! So, I asked him is he going to contract someone or am I? Then its, I have a friend in the hospital, don't know when he's getting out, but he does this kind of work. WHATEVER AGAIN!
Mr. Evans came yesterday, with no notice, with the faucet and repaired the break. I gave the receipt to Ras today on our way to the festival. He stated that he was surprised that I was charging him. Did he not agree to repair the break! $25.00 dollars: $10.00 for the part, $15.00 for the labour. Mr. Evans wants the money to go to the Stone County Our Daily Bread Food Pantry. To have Ras make the check out to them. For sure. Then Ras said Well pay me for cutting your grass! I started and wanted to say, Kiss My Ass. But instead, said, I didn't ask you to cut my grass. I didn't need you to cut my grass. I have always cut my grass myself!
Contiued in silence to the festival. Really wanted to get over this thing with the water line. Music and food was good. Had a good time. Small event without the overwhelming crowds that New Orleans is known for. Ras asked me if I saw anything that I liked at one of the vendors. I did, a $35.00 turquoise and amber necklace/earring set by Tee's Treasures by Terry Zechenelly: 985-643-4945 (note for myself). He didn't have $35.00. WHAT! Why ask me if I see anything that I liked! Joe, always kept a couple of hundred in his pocket. Isn't that what men do???LOLOLOL!! They are always prepared to handle things. They know. I didn't ask nor to expected, but when you asked be prepared to carry through.
Asked if I wanted to go past his house for drinks. Not! Then he had nerve to ask for a kiss once I got home. NOT! He has no clue that he failed the exam when he left before the City arrived. He failed again when he felt there was no need to replace the damage that he was responsible for causing. He failed when he didn't think he should cover the costs of the repair. He failed when he commented that he should have charged me for cutting my grass. He failed for not having $35.00.
Deuces!
I tried God but I can't do a "3".
I love you much and with you I will always be good. Thanks again,
Yo
Friday, June 24, 2011
Decadent Dark Chocolate---Gold Leaf
I'm not sure what happened to this entry of the Major but it was inadvertently deleted. An omen ... perhaps. Why ... I was sitting at a table with him having dinner ... went to show him the entry dedicated to "at first meeting" ... using his iPad ... gone .... An omen!
But I will try to recap my thoughts of him.
Pulled in the service station outside of Camp Shelby. Not noticing right away but catching out of the corner of my eye ... this man in uniform approaching me from the car just ahead of me.
Looking up I see this beautiful dark chocolate man in uniform with a gold leaf on his chest -- Major.
Intriguing. Sexy! Well spoken. Confident to the point of arrogance. Sexy ...!
A special dark chocolate --- Dove Dark Chocolate. One square ... not the whole bar, would have been enough. Mouth-watering temptation. I'm wanting to kiss him, to taste him, to anticipate him.
Found out days after researching on fb .... he was married ... stay away, don't come any closer! So, tempting.
Every time he stepped into the store ... such excitement .... this isn't good ... The Major is not good for me ... He would definitely be a left turn down a well traveled road. Strength, Courage and Wisdom - The words of India Irie.
I asked the Major to keep his distance ... no, friendship is not an option ... not with a man such as him
Perhaps, this is all that needs to be remembered! Perhaps, the other entry had to tooooo much ... It did get several hits from readers. LOLOL
Major drove me home after dinner ... a good kisser ... he felt as a thought he would .. Trouble .. Not sampling .. Strength, Courage and Wisdom! Some things you just don't need to experience to know. Holding it in my hand is enough.
Major ... this is dedicated to you! Thank you for a very nice evening. You are full of sensuality but are also the arms of curiosity for me and I'm staying at arms distance.
But I will try to recap my thoughts of him.
Pulled in the service station outside of Camp Shelby. Not noticing right away but catching out of the corner of my eye ... this man in uniform approaching me from the car just ahead of me.
Looking up I see this beautiful dark chocolate man in uniform with a gold leaf on his chest -- Major.
Intriguing. Sexy! Well spoken. Confident to the point of arrogance. Sexy ...!
A special dark chocolate --- Dove Dark Chocolate. One square ... not the whole bar, would have been enough. Mouth-watering temptation. I'm wanting to kiss him, to taste him, to anticipate him.
Found out days after researching on fb .... he was married ... stay away, don't come any closer! So, tempting.
Every time he stepped into the store ... such excitement .... this isn't good ... The Major is not good for me ... He would definitely be a left turn down a well traveled road. Strength, Courage and Wisdom - The words of India Irie.
I asked the Major to keep his distance ... no, friendship is not an option ... not with a man such as him
Perhaps, this is all that needs to be remembered! Perhaps, the other entry had to tooooo much ... It did get several hits from readers. LOLOL
Major drove me home after dinner ... a good kisser ... he felt as a thought he would .. Trouble .. Not sampling .. Strength, Courage and Wisdom! Some things you just don't need to experience to know. Holding it in my hand is enough.
Major ... this is dedicated to you! Thank you for a very nice evening. You are full of sensuality but are also the arms of curiosity for me and I'm staying at arms distance.
Wednesday, June 22, 2011
Longing, Abraham's Song
When I search for Beth Moore's, "Abraham's Song", I came upon another blogger that also learned of this poem through the Patriach's study.
In lieu of cutting and pasting, I've decided to link this post to her blog.
Her words in this entry reflects my heart.
Thank you God for agreement,
Yo
In lieu of cutting and pasting, I've decided to link this post to her blog.
Her words in this entry reflects my heart.
Thank you God for agreement,
Yo
Endings and Beginnings
Hello God,
In the words of Beth Moore referencing Genesis to who you are.
Today, thank you God, the message I received today in the final chapter of the Patriachs study helped me understand the longing for stability, longing for closure.
Hebrews 11:13-16. Like the scripture, I admit that I've felt like a foreigner and stranger here in Mississippi just as well as in Maryland. I have said that I am looking, longing for a resting place of my own. I haven't thought about the Baltimore that I had left and have had opportunity to return. Instead, I long for a better place —Now, I understand the feeling is not depression but a longing for a heavenly one. As scripture states, I don't necessary need a building but I went to be where God wants me to be, as long as He is going to be there with me. I'll never be alone for God is with me.
I've prayed the Prayer of Jabaz for years. In response, God has place me in the middle of many "expanding territories".
I have often wonder about the events of my life wondering as many do.... "Why me God?" Genesis 50:20. God, use what has happened in my life, that You have redeemed, to speak to someone else's deliverance.
Thank you God for not being ashamed to be called my God, for You have prepared a place for me.
Thank you with all my life,
Yo
In the words of Beth Moore referencing Genesis to who you are.
- He's the Alpha and Omega. God, after every omega there will be an alpha.
- El Olam, the Eternal God. God has no endings.
- Endings are not natural to us because we are built for forever.
- God can take a string of somethings that are awful into a string of somethings wonderful. Only God can redeem a tragedy into a string of deliverance.
- There is nothing that Satan can deal me that God cannot trump!
- When God blesses us; we then become blessings for/to others.
Today, thank you God, the message I received today in the final chapter of the Patriachs study helped me understand the longing for stability, longing for closure.
Hebrews 11:13-16. Like the scripture, I admit that I've felt like a foreigner and stranger here in Mississippi just as well as in Maryland. I have said that I am looking, longing for a resting place of my own. I haven't thought about the Baltimore that I had left and have had opportunity to return. Instead, I long for a better place —Now, I understand the feeling is not depression but a longing for a heavenly one. As scripture states, I don't necessary need a building but I went to be where God wants me to be, as long as He is going to be there with me. I'll never be alone for God is with me.
I've prayed the Prayer of Jabaz for years. In response, God has place me in the middle of many "expanding territories".
I have often wonder about the events of my life wondering as many do.... "Why me God?" Genesis 50:20. God, use what has happened in my life, that You have redeemed, to speak to someone else's deliverance.
Thank you God for not being ashamed to be called my God, for You have prepared a place for me.
Thank you with all my life,
Yo
Tuesday, June 21, 2011
Staying on the Path
Hi God,
Today I pedalled from Gulfport's Island View to Long Beach's boat marina: one-way 2.9 miles for a total of almost 6 miles. I wasn't tired. Not out of breath. It was a good ride.
Ate junk food the rest of the day while volunteering at the Food Pantry.
Ate more junk food at bible study tonight. And I fell asleep. Not sure for how long. LOLOL!
But it was still a good day.
Let's talk more tomorrow!
Yo
Today I pedalled from Gulfport's Island View to Long Beach's boat marina: one-way 2.9 miles for a total of almost 6 miles. I wasn't tired. Not out of breath. It was a good ride.
Ate junk food the rest of the day while volunteering at the Food Pantry.
Ate more junk food at bible study tonight. And I fell asleep. Not sure for how long. LOLOL!
But it was still a good day.
Let's talk more tomorrow!
Yo
Thursday, June 16, 2011
Happy Birthday ME!
Hey God,
I had a wonderful day today. Thank you.
Went to a four-star restaurant for dinner: Vrazel's. Wonderful appetizer, escargot; dinner, salmon with spinach with rice pilaf, good salad and dessert: Cremé Bruleé.
Oh don't let me forget, there was a rainbow today on our way to the coast. What a sign of wonders.
He opened the door just like I described. Pulled out my chair. He gave me a wonderul birthday card!
Well, thanks God for a nice day.
Good nite Lord,
Yolanda
I had a wonderful day today. Thank you.
Went to a four-star restaurant for dinner: Vrazel's. Wonderful appetizer, escargot; dinner, salmon with spinach with rice pilaf, good salad and dessert: Cremé Bruleé.
Oh don't let me forget, there was a rainbow today on our way to the coast. What a sign of wonders.
He opened the door just like I described. Pulled out my chair. He gave me a wonderul birthday card!
Well, thanks God for a nice day.
Good nite Lord,
Yolanda
Wednesday, June 15, 2011
WTF!
God,
People are so incredibly stupid!
Riding my bike this morning to bible study ... one more week of the Patriarchs. Next study may be Jonah...a six-week study for July ....
But anyway, Mitch passed me in his truck and stopped up at the gas station. Very short conversation ... said he would stop by after I returned home.
He wasn't in the house two minutes before he was touching and feeling. When I put him off with a "Are you kidding!" Then he preceded to leave. So, I asked him was he only here for a booty call and since that was a wash was he now leaving. He said, Yep, in the Mitch tradition. LOLOLOL
Haven't heard a peep from the Match.com date ... boy, excitement went to fizzle quickly. Not sure why. Perhaps, there was no chemistry for him ... I was trying something out of my comfort zone ... but it is what it is ...
Was watch Las Vegas ... the young consierge was describing sex with her new husband for the first time .... she rated him a "3". She said she couldn't be married to a "3". The honesty! Finally someone other than me declared a rating system. Men do it all the time!
Chicago has always critized me for putting men a rating system! But you know what you know. I couldn't be with a "3" or "4" .... I'll just skip ... he would definately need to bring 8 -9. I know what I know.
God, I remember the dream .... I am only going down the bright lit path ... no hard work with this .... too early for hard work!
Will talk later,
Yo
People are so incredibly stupid!
Riding my bike this morning to bible study ... one more week of the Patriarchs. Next study may be Jonah...a six-week study for July ....
But anyway, Mitch passed me in his truck and stopped up at the gas station. Very short conversation ... said he would stop by after I returned home.
He wasn't in the house two minutes before he was touching and feeling. When I put him off with a "Are you kidding!" Then he preceded to leave. So, I asked him was he only here for a booty call and since that was a wash was he now leaving. He said, Yep, in the Mitch tradition. LOLOLOL
Haven't heard a peep from the Match.com date ... boy, excitement went to fizzle quickly. Not sure why. Perhaps, there was no chemistry for him ... I was trying something out of my comfort zone ... but it is what it is ...
Was watch Las Vegas ... the young consierge was describing sex with her new husband for the first time .... she rated him a "3". She said she couldn't be married to a "3". The honesty! Finally someone other than me declared a rating system. Men do it all the time!
Chicago has always critized me for putting men a rating system! But you know what you know. I couldn't be with a "3" or "4" .... I'll just skip ... he would definately need to bring 8 -9. I know what I know.
God, I remember the dream .... I am only going down the bright lit path ... no hard work with this .... too early for hard work!
Will talk later,
Yo
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
Started Slow but a Good Ending
Well God,
You always have surprises!
Volunteered at the Food Pantry today ... just decided at the last minute.
After closing, a gentlemen from a church I visited. Turns out to be a friend of Joe's. Even more funny, after my visit to his church, he went to Joe's to inquire about who I am and what Joe knew of me ... am I seeing anyone. HaHa! Of course, Joe said that he was seeing me. That shut Mr. Ras Cooley down. lololo that was just like Joe.
Well, I guess with Joe's death, I'm back on the town's availability list. lolool
Well, he asked what did I want to do for my birthday! I told him to surprise me! Arrange the date. He's recommending Copelands. I've been to Copelands in Maryland. Good food.
Would suspect the restaurant would be more authentic here on the coast ... so, I'm looking forward to the good eats.
Well, in one day I went from a bust with Chicago not coming and no birthday plans to a evening in Slidell, LA for a nite of good eating.
Thanks,
God
You always have surprises!
Volunteered at the Food Pantry today ... just decided at the last minute.
After closing, a gentlemen from a church I visited. Turns out to be a friend of Joe's. Even more funny, after my visit to his church, he went to Joe's to inquire about who I am and what Joe knew of me ... am I seeing anyone. HaHa! Of course, Joe said that he was seeing me. That shut Mr. Ras Cooley down. lololo that was just like Joe.
Well, I guess with Joe's death, I'm back on the town's availability list. lolool
Well, he asked what did I want to do for my birthday! I told him to surprise me! Arrange the date. He's recommending Copelands. I've been to Copelands in Maryland. Good food.
Would suspect the restaurant would be more authentic here on the coast ... so, I'm looking forward to the good eats.
Well, in one day I went from a bust with Chicago not coming and no birthday plans to a evening in Slidell, LA for a nite of good eating.
Thanks,
God
It's in His Plan
Well God,
Chicago (with two r's) called today and said his mom had a stroke last night while he was visiting. He's feeling that he in some way contributed to her illness.
Not that this is about me, but of course God, I have my thoughts as it relates to the dream ....
Chicago told me last week that he may be delayed arriving for birthday week due to work. My thoughts, he should have placed a leave slip at least two months ago. Work is no excuse.
Chicago left a message last night that as he anticipated, he would wrapping up his assignment today and arriving tomorrow, Wednesday.
Well, that's not happening now. Work will not take precedence over today's events involving his mom.
So, again, it's about priorities, planned and unplanned.
Do I think of my birthday as significant as his mom's illness. NO WAY! But it does demonstrate that he did not make plans nor did he make any adjustment to his lack of planning. Priorities.
I have to remember that Chicago is not a husband or boyfriend, but my best friend.
I didn't call Daryl (with one r from Match.com) for lunch. I'm going to ask him to the movies tomorrow nite to see X-men.
God, We will see,
Yolanda
Chicago (with two r's) called today and said his mom had a stroke last night while he was visiting. He's feeling that he in some way contributed to her illness.
Not that this is about me, but of course God, I have my thoughts as it relates to the dream ....
Chicago told me last week that he may be delayed arriving for birthday week due to work. My thoughts, he should have placed a leave slip at least two months ago. Work is no excuse.
Chicago left a message last night that as he anticipated, he would wrapping up his assignment today and arriving tomorrow, Wednesday.
Well, that's not happening now. Work will not take precedence over today's events involving his mom.
So, again, it's about priorities, planned and unplanned.
Do I think of my birthday as significant as his mom's illness. NO WAY! But it does demonstrate that he did not make plans nor did he make any adjustment to his lack of planning. Priorities.
I have to remember that Chicago is not a husband or boyfriend, but my best friend.
I didn't call Daryl (with one r from Match.com) for lunch. I'm going to ask him to the movies tomorrow nite to see X-men.
God, We will see,
Yolanda
Two Days to Go
Hi God,
The Match.com date went well. I would rate it a six.
He did most of the talking. Quite the conversationalist. Didn't feel like I had to pull a conversation out of him. That's a plus.
I know I shouldn't but: he's attractive, fit: hard legs, muscular. Doesn't rate sex as a priority in a relationship. That was different. I made no comment one way or the other.
I left him my number in a voice message thanking him for dessert. Neither one of us was really hungry. That worked well.
Wondering since I'm off today whether to call him for lunch today.
Once I'm back at Camp Shelby...Took the week off for my birthday. Yeah, its without pay but whatever ... at minimum wage does it matter. I'll be back on the schedule next week.
Yesterday at the beach was a good way to begin. The heat was great and later Daryl's company was without any discomfort. I think the conversation was relaxed and honest.
I guess I can call and leave a message. Was the worst that can happen? He not return my call. Then, its a wrap and a whatever ... Move on .... Don't get stalled!
I think this the last two weeks of the Patriarch's study. If no plans ... we go tonight and tomorrow. The groups of women are so different ... the evening is a younger more transparent group and the morning is older, elderly, much more conservative in our discussion.
What's going on with the soldier???? Deuces! But I knew that when he replied, "I don't know. I'm okay ... I think" Average. Whatever...What a waste of 240lbs.
Forgive me God,
Yolanda
The Match.com date went well. I would rate it a six.
He did most of the talking. Quite the conversationalist. Didn't feel like I had to pull a conversation out of him. That's a plus.
I know I shouldn't but: he's attractive, fit: hard legs, muscular. Doesn't rate sex as a priority in a relationship. That was different. I made no comment one way or the other.
I left him my number in a voice message thanking him for dessert. Neither one of us was really hungry. That worked well.
Wondering since I'm off today whether to call him for lunch today.
Once I'm back at Camp Shelby...Took the week off for my birthday. Yeah, its without pay but whatever ... at minimum wage does it matter. I'll be back on the schedule next week.
Yesterday at the beach was a good way to begin. The heat was great and later Daryl's company was without any discomfort. I think the conversation was relaxed and honest.
I guess I can call and leave a message. Was the worst that can happen? He not return my call. Then, its a wrap and a whatever ... Move on .... Don't get stalled!
I think this the last two weeks of the Patriarch's study. If no plans ... we go tonight and tomorrow. The groups of women are so different ... the evening is a younger more transparent group and the morning is older, elderly, much more conservative in our discussion.
What's going on with the soldier???? Deuces! But I knew that when he replied, "I don't know. I'm okay ... I think" Average. Whatever...What a waste of 240lbs.
Forgive me God,
Yolanda
Monday, June 13, 2011
Getting Closer
Hey God,
Wasn't going to do a weight update but I am.
I am BELOW 180lbs! Hey me! Of course, with your help.
I am currently weighing in at 178lbs. Not quite my goal weight but I'm glad that I continuing to progress.
I remember the doctor's warning about the high cholesterol. Lose weight and exercise. All weight loss and exercise is going to help the rehab of the knee. So its all good!
Well, maybe a free hours sweating in the sun will burn off a pound or two.
Still need to work on that cellulite :) but overall I feel good about the change that I'm seeing.
Thanks again and always,
Yo
ps: please continue to place a hedge of protection, especially Casini, around my children and my family.
Wasn't going to do a weight update but I am.
I am BELOW 180lbs! Hey me! Of course, with your help.
I am currently weighing in at 178lbs. Not quite my goal weight but I'm glad that I continuing to progress.
I remember the doctor's warning about the high cholesterol. Lose weight and exercise. All weight loss and exercise is going to help the rehab of the knee. So its all good!
Well, maybe a free hours sweating in the sun will burn off a pound or two.
Still need to work on that cellulite :) but overall I feel good about the change that I'm seeing.
Thanks again and always,
Yo
ps: please continue to place a hedge of protection, especially Casini, around my children and my family.
Where Is He?
Hi God,
Well, different song, same lyrics pretty much.
In Jennifer Hudson's song, Where you at?
It looks like all women are looking for the same thing. Asking God for the same thing.
A man, an angel from above that's going to love me for life.
Meeting Daryl, one (r) from Match.com for an early dinner at Bonefish Grill today.
I'm going down to the beach for some sun and then to the mall to meet him.
Let's see how it goes. Daryl is from New Jersey and works at the Shipyard in Gulfport.
Thanks God for the date and a day on the beach!
Love you always,
Yo
Well, different song, same lyrics pretty much.
In Jennifer Hudson's song, Where you at?
It looks like all women are looking for the same thing. Asking God for the same thing.
A man, an angel from above that's going to love me for life.
Meeting Daryl, one (r) from Match.com for an early dinner at Bonefish Grill today.
I'm going down to the beach for some sun and then to the mall to meet him.
Let's see how it goes. Daryl is from New Jersey and works at the Shipyard in Gulfport.
Thanks God for the date and a day on the beach!
Love you always,
Yo
Monday, June 6, 2011
Laid to Rest
Hi God,
We all know that it was just the shell of a man put into the ground today. It was not Joe. I know that he did not want to leave this earth just yet but he did not take care of himself or his heart.
I wrote something to say today but didn't say it. But decided to place it here:
We all know that it was just the shell of a man put into the ground today. It was not Joe. I know that he did not want to leave this earth just yet but he did not take care of himself or his heart.
I wrote something to say today but didn't say it. But decided to place it here:
Hello,
I want to tell you a short story of a courtship that begins here in Bethlehem. I was asked if my story would be offensive to his family or to Laura. No, my intent is to pay tribute to the man whose integrity is well known best by those who love him.
Today, you will hear or have heard about Joe the devoted husband, doting father, generous grand-father and a man who loved God and his church.
Joe had some help initiating his plan from a few Bethlehem matchmakers. Thank you Mr. Walter Galloway and Ms. Voncile Martin.
Ladies, have you ever been courted by a gentleman? The way you see in the movies. Flowers, cards, candy, dinner, wine. Joe did it ole’ school …Now, let me make it clear … he was still very much a man but he targeted my heart first. For Joe it was simple. Patience and a plan.
Courtship is not some arcane method of wooing a woman that went out the window in the 50s. It's actually alive and well and guys… if you are aiming to win a gal's heart… listen closely.
According to Joe: How To Court A Woman:
You court a woman with courtesy, respect and these simple tips.
Joe knew how important it is to treat a woman, he opened my door - to buildings as well as to cars - pull out my seat and when I stood to walk away, Joe would stand as well and re-seat only after I had walked away - when I returned, Joe stood again and pull out my seat and stood as I sat. Joe would gently remove and hang my jacket. Joe was chivalrous and accommodating. It's not about getting special treatment in return it's a matter of manners, genuine interest, concern and grooming … Joe always smelt good and kept a fresh cut.
You court a woman with courtesy, respect and these simple tips.
Joe knew how important it is to treat a woman, he opened my door - to buildings as well as to cars - pull out my seat and when I stood to walk away, Joe would stand as well and re-seat only after I had walked away - when I returned, Joe stood again and pull out my seat and stood as I sat. Joe would gently remove and hang my jacket. Joe was chivalrous and accommodating. It's not about getting special treatment in return it's a matter of manners, genuine interest, concern and grooming … Joe always smelt good and kept a fresh cut.
Step 1
Bring her flowers. As much as some women say flowers are wasteful and dumb, we will melt at the sight of a wide, bright bouquet.
Bring her flowers. As much as some women say flowers are wasteful and dumb, we will melt at the sight of a wide, bright bouquet.
Joe was a man that love romance and being romantic. For two months, Joe sent flowers every other week until he became known to the florist as the Flower Man. On alternate weeks, I received a card. I started receiving Valentines cards beginning in the middle of January.
Step 2
Call her every day just to say "Hi." If daily seems too much, make it frequently enough that you are not annoying but show you care. The conversations don't have to be lengthy, but they will get the point across that you are thinking of her often and love the sound of her voice.
Call her every day just to say "Hi." If daily seems too much, make it frequently enough that you are not annoying but show you care. The conversations don't have to be lengthy, but they will get the point across that you are thinking of her often and love the sound of her voice.
Step 3
Give her gifts. You don't have to spring for a diamond tennis bracelet. Any given day, Joe left gifts on my mother’s front porch. It through me at first, bags of greens and cabbages, gardening gloves, cotton plants … the things that he loved to do and wanted to share with me.
Step 4
Write her a poem or letter. Even if you don't reckon yourself a poet, write a short paragraph about how she makes you feel. This will make her melt more than the flowers.
Give her gifts. You don't have to spring for a diamond tennis bracelet. Any given day, Joe left gifts on my mother’s front porch. It through me at first, bags of greens and cabbages, gardening gloves, cotton plants … the things that he loved to do and wanted to share with me.
Step 4
Write her a poem or letter. Even if you don't reckon yourself a poet, write a short paragraph about how she makes you feel. This will make her melt more than the flowers.
One Sunday Joe asked me what did I cook for dinner and I told him that I hadn’t cook. He asked me where I would like to go. The next Sunday, Deacon Breland was passing me a note from the pews like kids in a classroom. On it was written these words, “If you let me look in your face, you never have to cook another Sunday dinner.” Ladies, from that Sunday on, Joe and I had a standing Sunday dinner date. Ladies, Joe let it be known that nothing and no one would be interfering with his courting, not even the Bethlehem Search Committee. For Joe it was simple he had somewhere to be. Dinner with me.
Once I tried to pay, pulled out my credit card, you know take turns. Oh whew, why did I do that. Joe got a look on his face and directed me to put it away. Joe with a firm voice, “Don’t do that again. When you’re with me, you’ll never have to pay for anything.”
Step 5
Make her every wish your desire. This doesn't mean kissing her feet, unless that's her wish and you don't mind, but it does mean catering to her whims when she wants to picnic at midnight on a hilltop or drive across the country on the spur of the moment. Show her the lengths you'll go to just to make her happy.
Joe provided me with a courtship that many women never experience. One filled with romance, respect and patience. An old-fashion courtship where we learned about each other, taking time to become friends. Morning coffees, drives along the beach, evenings on the porch swing sharing a bottle of Mascato or tailgating with fried catfish and a six-pack of Corona.
Make her every wish your desire. This doesn't mean kissing her feet, unless that's her wish and you don't mind, but it does mean catering to her whims when she wants to picnic at midnight on a hilltop or drive across the country on the spur of the moment. Show her the lengths you'll go to just to make her happy.
Joe provided me with a courtship that many women never experience. One filled with romance, respect and patience. An old-fashion courtship where we learned about each other, taking time to become friends. Morning coffees, drives along the beach, evenings on the porch swing sharing a bottle of Mascato or tailgating with fried catfish and a six-pack of Corona.
Some may say well look what patience got us … was it worth waiting considering our ages, taking our time. Yes it was worth waiting, No, I have no regrets. Joe and I lived within the Grace of God. Joe left me with my respect and without sin. Joe’s integrity and reputation of being a Godly man remains in tact not tarnished by rumors or innuendos of goings on behind closed doors. We kept God’s covenant.
Joe said all good things are worth waiting for. All good things come to those who wait on Lord. Joe believed and treated me like a “good” thing.
Ladies, do the men or man in your life make you feel like a “good thing” worth waiting for?
Joe left with me his gift for my future … I am a good thing worth waiting for. Vernae and Chante you’ve have the best template on what to look for a man, a husband … look for one that’s that exemplifies Joe.
Joe taught me that love is not complicated. We make it complicated or maybe the complication is a sign that its not meant for us. Joe taught me that life and love can be simple when you put God first.
Thank you, God for the time I had Joe as my friend. I will miss him greatly.
Yo
Yo
Saturday, June 4, 2011
I Had a Dream
Hello God,
I had a dream several weeks ago, before Joe's death, but You know that already. Thank you for the vision.
My dream:
I'm walking through an underground mall. I had the feeling of being in another country, Italy or Greece, the feel of an old city but not France or Egypt.
I started looking for a way out, up to street level.
Then,
I found myself again walking through the same mall, but remembering my previous experience of walking through the mall and knowing that there is a way out: well lit, easy, simple ....
I got outside the mall and looked at the stairs leading up to the streets ...
I saw an alternate stairway leading downward, shadowed, dark ... I wondered where it went ... where would it take me ....
No sooner than I step to descend I felt it. That gut feeling telling me to turn around but I kept going ...
No sooner I was off the stairwell and stepped on the floor, a group of guys ... Latinos walked passed me carrying weapons, automatic rifles.
I thought about turning around and following them out .... but I didn't. Kept walking.
I passed a second group of men ... white .... one man watching me ... we locked eyes ... I looked away passing the group ... Once passed, the man man turned around to attack me. I screamed and woke up.
Hm mm, didn't think much about it until weeks later, just thought of it as a bad dream.
Last week, Tuesday, during the Beth's Moore Bible Study of the Patriarchs, the workbook instructed us to write down our last remembered dream. I did! We were studying Joesph's interpretation of Pharaoh's dreams.
I have a dream book, Understanding the Dreams You Dream.
Dream Interpretation: Using the book, I picked out some of the elements from the dream:
God has always shown me the way, His way. Yet, so many times, I've looked at the other path and wondered where did it go ....
What did/does the darkness or shadows offer? Nothing. Emptiness. Darkness.
Joe was a simple, well lit path. I saw a sweet, old man infactuated with a woman he wanted to get to know.
I turned to go down that dark path: Sean maybe, Chicago maybe, a soldier that's my age, single, healthy and strong that doesn't drink or smoke and professes to love the Lord .... how inticing is he! How delicious is the lusting thoughts of him!
I have to start listening to God, to my gut, to my spirit of discernment ... Going up is so much easier ... perhaps the more I do that the easier it becomes.
I guess its like hugging. The first time is feels uncomfortable, invasive, violating maybe. But the more you experience, the more you desire it, then the more you can give it.
Thank you Lord,
Yo
I had a dream several weeks ago, before Joe's death, but You know that already. Thank you for the vision.
My dream:
I'm walking through an underground mall. I had the feeling of being in another country, Italy or Greece, the feel of an old city but not France or Egypt.
- The walls were a white, stone.
- For some reason, limestone keeps popping into my head.
- The walls were natural, rough not smoothed like granite countertops.
- The stores were normal, Ann Taylor, Victoria Secrets, typical upscale mall stores.
I started looking for a way out, up to street level.
- I saw a stairway outside,
- bright sunlight,
- people existing,
- walking up some carved out steps,
- no railing,
- but no sense of fear or falling
Then,
I found myself again walking through the same mall, but remembering my previous experience of walking through the mall and knowing that there is a way out: well lit, easy, simple ....
I got outside the mall and looked at the stairs leading up to the streets ...
I saw an alternate stairway leading downward, shadowed, dark ... I wondered where it went ... where would it take me ....
No sooner than I step to descend I felt it. That gut feeling telling me to turn around but I kept going ...
No sooner I was off the stairwell and stepped on the floor, a group of guys ... Latinos walked passed me carrying weapons, automatic rifles.
I thought about turning around and following them out .... but I didn't. Kept walking.
I passed a second group of men ... white .... one man watching me ... we locked eyes ... I looked away passing the group ... Once passed, the man man turned around to attack me. I screamed and woke up.
Hm mm, didn't think much about it until weeks later, just thought of it as a bad dream.
Last week, Tuesday, during the Beth's Moore Bible Study of the Patriarchs, the workbook instructed us to write down our last remembered dream. I did! We were studying Joesph's interpretation of Pharaoh's dreams.
I have a dream book, Understanding the Dreams You Dream.
Dream Interpretation: Using the book, I picked out some of the elements from the dream:
- City: Characteristic: that for which the city is now; the Church; a person's character (Acts 20:23, Proverbs 25:28)
- Mall: World: Worldliness; ripe field for evangelism.(1John 2:15)
- Upstairs (or the Upper Room) - Spiritual: Thought (godly or carnal); prayer; spiritual service. (Acts 1:13-14)
- Up: Above: Help; advancement, promotion, difficulty (as in "it's all uphill from here"); salvation. (Psalm18:16)
- Down: Beneath: Humbled; demotion, worldly. (Psalm 75:7)
- Guns: (Looked in metals) Lead: Weight: Wickedness; sin; burden (the cares of the world); judgement; fool or foolishness. (Zechariah 5:8; Hebrews 12:1)
- Numbers: Five (number of men in the groups): Serve: Works; service; bondage (including debt, sickness, phobias, etc) taxes, prison, sin; motion. (Romans 7:5; John 8:34)
- Man (stranger) Angel, oneself, or demon. Felt like demon: person with evil intent; danger (Matthew 2:13)
God has always shown me the way, His way. Yet, so many times, I've looked at the other path and wondered where did it go ....
- Why?
- Why not take the well lit, well defined path?
- Why walk into the shadows? By choice?
What did/does the darkness or shadows offer? Nothing. Emptiness. Darkness.
Joe was a simple, well lit path. I saw a sweet, old man infactuated with a woman he wanted to get to know.
I turned to go down that dark path: Sean maybe, Chicago maybe, a soldier that's my age, single, healthy and strong that doesn't drink or smoke and professes to love the Lord .... how inticing is he! How delicious is the lusting thoughts of him!
I have to start listening to God, to my gut, to my spirit of discernment ... Going up is so much easier ... perhaps the more I do that the easier it becomes.
I guess its like hugging. The first time is feels uncomfortable, invasive, violating maybe. But the more you experience, the more you desire it, then the more you can give it.
Thank you Lord,
Yo
Wednesday, June 1, 2011
June 1st and Counting
Hello God,
Well counting down to the 16th.
Here's the photos to begin the month of June.
Well counting down to the 16th.
Here's the photos to begin the month of June.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Good-Bye Joe
Thank you God,
I hinted to Joe, the Deacon, in my January 14th entry. Joe and I first went to a Holiday party sponsored by a black ladies group here in Stone County.
He got one of the members to let me know that a ticket to the event was purchased on my behalf.
Now mind you, GC, had already gone to church with me a couple of times. Joe was aware that I was seeing someone.
Joe, all of 70 years, said he didn't mind competition.
What threw me was Joe would leave little gifts on my mother's front porch. I thought was a wonderful way for two old people to be courting. Bag of greens, cotton plants, flash lights and garden gloves ... always two sets. One for her and one for me. Thanks for leaving one for me, too!
Joe is an older man so I thought his interest was in my mother but much to my surprise ... it was me that Joe was after.
Joe began sending flowers and cards. A bouquet of flowers one week, a card the next for about two months. Courting, ole school style.
One day in church, Joe asked me to dinner. Joe sent me a note: If you would let me look in your face, you do not ever have to cook another Sunday dinner.
How simple Joe made it. But I held on to my six month rule. Today was the last day of the fifth month. Joe was looking forward to the six month. LOLOLOL
Joe waited for me and then died without ever having experiencing me. I kept to the rule and today I feel bad.
Joe Breland, you are a wonderul guy, friend and I am going to miss you the rest of my life. My coffee with you in the morning and Sunday dinners.
I love you so much for letting me know and experience I am worth the wait. Thank you.
Thank you God for allowing me the gift of one of your angels for a short while.
Love you always,
Yo
I hinted to Joe, the Deacon, in my January 14th entry. Joe and I first went to a Holiday party sponsored by a black ladies group here in Stone County.
He got one of the members to let me know that a ticket to the event was purchased on my behalf.
Now mind you, GC, had already gone to church with me a couple of times. Joe was aware that I was seeing someone.
Joe, all of 70 years, said he didn't mind competition.
What threw me was Joe would leave little gifts on my mother's front porch. I thought was a wonderful way for two old people to be courting. Bag of greens, cotton plants, flash lights and garden gloves ... always two sets. One for her and one for me. Thanks for leaving one for me, too!
Joe is an older man so I thought his interest was in my mother but much to my surprise ... it was me that Joe was after.
Joe began sending flowers and cards. A bouquet of flowers one week, a card the next for about two months. Courting, ole school style.
One day in church, Joe asked me to dinner. Joe sent me a note: If you would let me look in your face, you do not ever have to cook another Sunday dinner.
How simple Joe made it. But I held on to my six month rule. Today was the last day of the fifth month. Joe was looking forward to the six month. LOLOLOL
Joe waited for me and then died without ever having experiencing me. I kept to the rule and today I feel bad.
Joe Breland, you are a wonderul guy, friend and I am going to miss you the rest of my life. My coffee with you in the morning and Sunday dinners.
I love you so much for letting me know and experience I am worth the wait. Thank you.
Thank you God for allowing me the gift of one of your angels for a short while.
Love you always,
Yo
Saturday, May 28, 2011
From the Mouth of Babes
Hello God,
At breakfast Ree asked how would I feel when my mother died and knowing that we had not made peace. She asked wouldn't that make me sad.
Of course, I told her but wanted such of relationship with her all my life, probably as long as she is old if not more.
Spoke with eldest son last night and he said he had thoughts of the same. I just can't get passed it. His incarceration had placed such a hardening in my heart for her. And now, it has spread to my sister which is very much a surprise.
I always believed that before I would do harm, I would leave him/her alone. I can't imagine doing harm to any one's child. My niece means so much to me to see her excel and become the successful woman, wife and mother ... if that's her dream. Part of support her dreams is not being a hindrance. Recognizing when she may be straying or heading towards danger ... and letting her parents know the same. But definitely, not becoming part of the problem.
In bible study this week, Beth Moore's the Patriarchs, we focused on Genesis 37. Here we learn where Joesph's brothers plotted to kill him out of jealousy but instead decided to sell him into slavery. Such a betrayal of love.
But later we find out .... Joesph held no animosity towards his brother. That's the place I need to reach.
My son says he prays for the healing of my mom's and my relationship. I know, if I don't do this for myself, I need to do this for my children. I believe I have a wonderful relationship with them. If nothing else, I pray for that curse to be broken. In the name of Jesus, Amen.
I learned that when there's hatred in a home ... it has to be dealt with. God can change any family from the inside out. God can remove violence from any home.
There's scarring on my heart. Psalms 55:4-8, 12-14, 20-21, speaks to the betrayal of the ones close to you. The wounds of an enemy is no way as scarring as the wounds of someone close to you, close to your heart.
Beth Moore suggest there may be four (4) reasons no apology:
1. They are oblivious that it has even occured in my eyes.
2. They are unwilling (power-driven).
3. Unable to give an apology.
4. God's unwilling.
Like Joesph, I always as a daughter and big sister, wanted to be a role-model and looked for their approval, respect, mercy, possibly their appreciation, an finally their welfare. There's nothing that either could ask, in my power, that I wouldn't do for either one.
I pray God that you deliver me from this harden heart. Better you break me where I have harden; rather than I snap and lose my mind and spirit.
In Jesus' precisous name,
your daughter,
Yo
At breakfast Ree asked how would I feel when my mother died and knowing that we had not made peace. She asked wouldn't that make me sad.
Of course, I told her but wanted such of relationship with her all my life, probably as long as she is old if not more.
Spoke with eldest son last night and he said he had thoughts of the same. I just can't get passed it. His incarceration had placed such a hardening in my heart for her. And now, it has spread to my sister which is very much a surprise.
I always believed that before I would do harm, I would leave him/her alone. I can't imagine doing harm to any one's child. My niece means so much to me to see her excel and become the successful woman, wife and mother ... if that's her dream. Part of support her dreams is not being a hindrance. Recognizing when she may be straying or heading towards danger ... and letting her parents know the same. But definitely, not becoming part of the problem.
In bible study this week, Beth Moore's the Patriarchs, we focused on Genesis 37. Here we learn where Joesph's brothers plotted to kill him out of jealousy but instead decided to sell him into slavery. Such a betrayal of love.
But later we find out .... Joesph held no animosity towards his brother. That's the place I need to reach.
My son says he prays for the healing of my mom's and my relationship. I know, if I don't do this for myself, I need to do this for my children. I believe I have a wonderful relationship with them. If nothing else, I pray for that curse to be broken. In the name of Jesus, Amen.
I learned that when there's hatred in a home ... it has to be dealt with. God can change any family from the inside out. God can remove violence from any home.
There's scarring on my heart. Psalms 55:4-8, 12-14, 20-21, speaks to the betrayal of the ones close to you. The wounds of an enemy is no way as scarring as the wounds of someone close to you, close to your heart.
Beth Moore suggest there may be four (4) reasons no apology:
1. They are oblivious that it has even occured in my eyes.
2. They are unwilling (power-driven).
3. Unable to give an apology.
4. God's unwilling.
Like Joesph, I always as a daughter and big sister, wanted to be a role-model and looked for their approval, respect, mercy, possibly their appreciation, an finally their welfare. There's nothing that either could ask, in my power, that I wouldn't do for either one.
I pray God that you deliver me from this harden heart. Better you break me where I have harden; rather than I snap and lose my mind and spirit.
In Jesus' precisous name,
your daughter,
Yo
Sunday, May 22, 2011
Four Weeks to Go till the big 50
And 10-15 lbs.
Goal weight between 165 - 175
Note: Currently weighing 182lbs from 200lbs.Thank you God, Love you always,
Yo
Alabaster Box
Hello Lord,
I played hookie from church today. I am really having struggles with Bethlehem. Last week in bible study at First United Methodist during the studying of the Patriachs the moderator commented on her testimony. Not sure why my mind is blank to her name, but I will come back and add it.
She mentioned CeCe Winans, Alabaster Box:
I can't forget the way life used to be
I was a prisoner to the sin that had me bound
And I spent my days
Poured my life without measure
Into a little treasure box
I'd thought I'd found
Until the day when Jesus came to me
And healed my soul
With the wonder of His touch
So now I'm giving back to Him
All the praise He's worthy of
I've been forgiven
And that's why
I love Him so much
Refrain
And I've come to pour
My praise on Him
Like oil from Mary's alabaster box
Don't be angry if I wash his feet with my tears
And dry them with my hair (my hair)
You weren't there the night Jesus found me
You did not feel what I felt
When He wrapped his loving arms around me and
You don't know the cost of the oil
Oh, you don't know the cost of my praise
You don't know the cost of the oil
In my alabaster box
There are so many women who have felt a prisoner of sin; even as mothers and wives. Doing things we didn't want to do but felt either we had no choice or perhaps no voice.
As the lyrics state ... don't be angry with me ... you have no idea from where the Lord delivered me ... from whom the Lord delivered me ...
Some folks would like to see you suffer, see you in lost or desperation. Rebuke those spirits in the name of Jesus.
As with the women at the well, our God sees all and knows all. I just so glad that He didn't send her away but ask her for a drink of water. In exchange He offered her everlasting life.
Thank you so much Jesus,
Yo
I played hookie from church today. I am really having struggles with Bethlehem. Last week in bible study at First United Methodist during the studying of the Patriachs the moderator commented on her testimony. Not sure why my mind is blank to her name, but I will come back and add it.
She mentioned CeCe Winans, Alabaster Box:
The room grew still
As she made her way to Jesus
She stumbles through the tears that made her blind
She felt such pain
Some spoke in anger
Heard folks whisper
There's no place here for her kind
Still on she came
Through the shame that flushed her face
Until at last, she knelt before his feet
And though she spoke no words
Everything she said was heard
As she poured her love for the Master
From her box of alabaster
Refrain
And I've come to pour
My praise on Him
Like oil from Mary's alabaster box
Don't be angry if I wash his feet with my tears
And I dry them with my hair
You weren't there the night He found me
You did not feel what I felt
When he wrapped his love all around me and
You don't know the cost of the oil
In my alabaster box
As she made her way to Jesus
She stumbles through the tears that made her blind
She felt such pain
Some spoke in anger
Heard folks whisper
There's no place here for her kind
Still on she came
Through the shame that flushed her face
Until at last, she knelt before his feet
And though she spoke no words
Everything she said was heard
As she poured her love for the Master
From her box of alabaster
Refrain
And I've come to pour
My praise on Him
Like oil from Mary's alabaster box
Don't be angry if I wash his feet with my tears
And I dry them with my hair
You weren't there the night He found me
You did not feel what I felt
When he wrapped his love all around me and
You don't know the cost of the oil
In my alabaster box
I can't forget the way life used to be
I was a prisoner to the sin that had me bound
And I spent my days
Poured my life without measure
Into a little treasure box
I'd thought I'd found
Until the day when Jesus came to me
And healed my soul
With the wonder of His touch
So now I'm giving back to Him
All the praise He's worthy of
I've been forgiven
And that's why
I love Him so much
Refrain
And I've come to pour
My praise on Him
Like oil from Mary's alabaster box
Don't be angry if I wash his feet with my tears
And dry them with my hair (my hair)
You weren't there the night Jesus found me
You did not feel what I felt
When He wrapped his loving arms around me and
You don't know the cost of the oil
Oh, you don't know the cost of my praise
You don't know the cost of the oil
In my alabaster box
There are so many women who have felt a prisoner of sin; even as mothers and wives. Doing things we didn't want to do but felt either we had no choice or perhaps no voice.
As the lyrics state ... don't be angry with me ... you have no idea from where the Lord delivered me ... from whom the Lord delivered me ...
Some folks would like to see you suffer, see you in lost or desperation. Rebuke those spirits in the name of Jesus.
As with the women at the well, our God sees all and knows all. I just so glad that He didn't send her away but ask her for a drink of water. In exchange He offered her everlasting life.
Thank you so much Jesus,
Yo
Saturday, May 21, 2011
Eharmony, Match, Chemistry Internet Dating
Well, finally it's in print! Not that we should need it, but in print gives us confirmation. Internet dating is a sham. The article, "Betrayal:"
I went met someone on BlackPeopleMeet.com. He was suppose to be a pilot and I won't say the rest. Too perfect is too perfect. He turned out to be an OLD drunk with a submissive wife who continually turned her head to his indiscretions, five daughters. DAUGHTERS! I how did I found out! After some detective work that I probably should have done from the onset. It was during a dark period after the accident. Desperate time. As I got better, stronger physically, mentally I became more alert. He even had a Facebook page that included his grandchildren and children. I alerted the District Attorney's office and other authorities along with his children. That made me whole from the deceit.
Eharmany resulted in no dates.
Match resulted in one date. At least I got to partake from a local restaurant I wanted to dine. I did meet some from Slidell, but it took so long for him to communicate, I lost interest.
Ultimately, I believe no love will be found through internet dating.
Be patient, wait on the Lord!.
I went met someone on BlackPeopleMeet.com. He was suppose to be a pilot and I won't say the rest. Too perfect is too perfect. He turned out to be an OLD drunk with a submissive wife who continually turned her head to his indiscretions, five daughters. DAUGHTERS! I how did I found out! After some detective work that I probably should have done from the onset. It was during a dark period after the accident. Desperate time. As I got better, stronger physically, mentally I became more alert. He even had a Facebook page that included his grandchildren and children. I alerted the District Attorney's office and other authorities along with his children. That made me whole from the deceit.
Eharmany resulted in no dates.
Match resulted in one date. At least I got to partake from a local restaurant I wanted to dine. I did meet some from Slidell, but it took so long for him to communicate, I lost interest.
Ultimately, I believe no love will be found through internet dating.
Be patient, wait on the Lord!.
Three Down, One More to Go!
Thank you God,
Isaac graduated yesterday evening from Stone High School. The past year and a half has been turmoil with him. I was both glad and proud to see him in his cap and gown.
I pray for him, Casini and Dorian everyday to you Lord to cover and keep them from harm, hurt and danger. Scripture says we do not fight against flesh but against evil spirits. I believe that so, Lord. I just never thought some of those spirit we be so close amongst my children. The jealousy and envy, I could never have foreseen.
Even still today, the treachery of my mother and sister completely blind-sides me. Yet, Lord I find myself praying for them always.
Your Word says to be patient and wait on You. I'm really trying Lord. I am really powerless to do anything else.
I love you Lord always.
Yo
Isaac graduated yesterday evening from Stone High School. The past year and a half has been turmoil with him. I was both glad and proud to see him in his cap and gown.
I pray for him, Casini and Dorian everyday to you Lord to cover and keep them from harm, hurt and danger. Scripture says we do not fight against flesh but against evil spirits. I believe that so, Lord. I just never thought some of those spirit we be so close amongst my children. The jealousy and envy, I could never have foreseen.
Even still today, the treachery of my mother and sister completely blind-sides me. Yet, Lord I find myself praying for them always.
Your Word says to be patient and wait on You. I'm really trying Lord. I am really powerless to do anything else.
I love you Lord always.
Yo
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Teenagers! Augh!!!!
God always sends you what you need. I'm always asking my daughter, Ree, what's on her mind. She's seems so quiet and GRUMPY! Lord, don't ask her if she's has an attitude about something ... you'll see and hear it! I respond most of the time probably inappropriately ... by yelling back and asking what did I do to you!!!!!?
Today, an article, "How Can I Get My Teenage Son to Open Up?" It can't be that much difference between a son and daughter????! Can it?
Thank you God!
I'm 180lbs! Ten to fifteen pounds to go by June 16th! Yay me!
Today, an article, "How Can I Get My Teenage Son to Open Up?" It can't be that much difference between a son and daughter????! Can it?
Thank you God!
I'm 180lbs! Ten to fifteen pounds to go by June 16th! Yay me!
Sunday, May 1, 2011
Thank you God for Camp Shelby
God,
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. I would have and had to have stayed at McDs until I found another job. My unemployment ended when I reported that I was "gainfully" employed. I would not be eligible to have those benefits reinstituted because I quit or got fired .... which may have happened eventually. How long could I have sustained that front of excitement and contentment??????
Well, the day before I accepted McD's, Camp Shelby called with an offer for a cashier position at the PX. I said yes. While waiting for the background check, I did manage to survive seven (7) days. When HR from Keesler Air Force Base called to say that the background was completed, boy was I elated. Although they did stipulate that the position would pay far less than McD's salaried manager.
Sometimes it about quality of life! Although I'm making minumum wage of $7.50/hr. My body is no longer suffering. I do get to talk with people, the soldiers and am not on a stop watch! Who knows but God where this simple but worthy position may lead.
Humble thyself. Be a servant.
Thank you God for Camp Shelby,
Yolanda
Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. I would have and had to have stayed at McDs until I found another job. My unemployment ended when I reported that I was "gainfully" employed. I would not be eligible to have those benefits reinstituted because I quit or got fired .... which may have happened eventually. How long could I have sustained that front of excitement and contentment??????
Well, the day before I accepted McD's, Camp Shelby called with an offer for a cashier position at the PX. I said yes. While waiting for the background check, I did manage to survive seven (7) days. When HR from Keesler Air Force Base called to say that the background was completed, boy was I elated. Although they did stipulate that the position would pay far less than McD's salaried manager.
Sometimes it about quality of life! Although I'm making minumum wage of $7.50/hr. My body is no longer suffering. I do get to talk with people, the soldiers and am not on a stop watch! Who knows but God where this simple but worthy position may lead.
Humble thyself. Be a servant.
Thank you God for Camp Shelby,
Yolanda
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